• bamfic@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    Demand lists and redline lists suck and make people look like assholes, regardless of their gender, and even when there are legit red lines you wont go near because of safety, which none of these are.

    In this case, a no fat chicks rule is gonna trigger every woman’s societal induced neurosis about weight and body dysmorphia, you fucked up, never say that one out loud to a woman. It marks you aspart of the body dysmorphia problem.

    No single moms, reasonable if you dont want kids or to be involved in raising one, but still makes you sound like an asshole. Not wanting or having kids is taboo even now, look at the shit that the republicans have been throwing at Kamala Harris. Rejecting a wonderful person because they have a kid is also dickish. And, depending on your age and where you live, the odds of finding a partner who does not have kids could be low to zero anyway.

    No dating apps? What planet do you live on? Dating apps are everywhere and for some people the only option for dating. People meet spouses on em. Oh just not hookup apps? Then this smells like slut shaming, in which case fuck you. I love sluts; don’t shame them or you will piss me off personally. If you want a virgin, become a religious fundamentalist and possibly a pedophile. People have sex and if you have a problem with that it’s probably a red flag.

    Sorry for the rant, this is greentext so probably all lies anyway, but it set me off.

    • Todd Bonzalez@lemm.ee
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      2 months ago

      I think the real issues here are:

      1. Making obesity your top concern just shows that the most important thing to you is a woman’s looks. That’s a red flag that other things aren’t as important.
      2. Making single moms a dealbreaker is somewhat derogatory. If you don’t want kids, make that your requirement, but a lot of men out there are really saying “I don’t want to raise another man’s kid”, which is another red flag of toxic masculinity.
      3. The “not on dating apps” requirement does seem to stem from the paranoia that women on dating apps are sluts (another toxic red flag), but that’s some self-hate right there. Pretty much every single woman is using dating apps because that’s how people date these days. If Tinder is a dealbreaker, you’re gonna die alone.

      So basically, if you’re a woman, and you hear a guy list these requirements, what you really hear is:

      1. Hot girls only, my sexual satisfaction is of the highest priority.
      2. I need to pretend you are a virgin, so I want to see no evidence that you existed as a sexual person before dating me, otherwise my ego will collapse.
      3. I hate women and think they’re sluts, so you better not have any qualities that I arbitrarily associate with promiscuity. See also: #2 about how I need to feel like I’m fucking a virgin. Also #1 where she better be hot.

      Honestly, I would judge any woman that dated a man this trashy.