• Klear@sh.itjust.works
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    6 months ago

    This reminds me of what happened to me many years ago. I was riding a moderately packed tram to school, still half asleep, when a guy came up to me and showed me an ID card. I thought he was a ticket inspector and so I look my pass and showed it to him. He nodded and went away.

    Only after a few seconds my brain finally managed to decipher what was written on his card - that he’s disabled. So obviously I jumped up and lead him to my seat with apologies, but I found it hilarious how we both apparently misunderstood each of our ID’s, just in opposite directions.

  • Zloubida@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    Not all handicaps are visible. I know someone, quite young (mid-30s) and very healthy-looking. But she has a bad tension: if she stays standing for too long, it’s very uncomfortable and she may even faint. Older people feel entitled to take her seat and don’t understand when she refuse.

    • Rhaedas@fedia.io
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      6 months ago

      If someone is taking a spot I’m going to default with the assumption that they need it for some reason. It’s an honor code and you hope most using the spaces aren’t abusing the privilege.

    • yetiftw@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      as a college student with arthritis I feel this one. still haven’t gotten used to asking for a seat on the bus

    • scoobford@lemmy.zip
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      6 months ago

      Shit, I’ve been this person since I was a teen. My BP drops like a rock in the heat, if I’m out in the summertime, I really can’t stand in place for more than a couple of minutes.

      Generally it isn’t an issue because there’s enough seats to go around (and I don’t live somewhere with public transit), but I’ve had one or two less than pleasant conversations when on vacation.

      • SomeoneElse@lemmy.ca
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        6 months ago

        I’ve never heard it called “bad tension” but I have POTS (postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome) which fits your symptoms. I can’t maintain my blood pressure when I stand still (or if I get too hot, bend down, lift my arms over my head, eat a big meal…) my heart rate skyrockets to try to compensate and I ultimately faint.

        I was diagnosed in 2012 and they’re still tweaking my medication to try and get it right. For most people it starts in their teenage years and they “outgrow” it within 5 years. For me it’s second to moderately severe Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, there’s no outgrowing it. I can’t go anywhere that requires more than a short walk from the car to a seat - queues are literally my enemy - so I use a wheelchair. The amount of dirty looks I get when I get out of my wheelchair to move to a more comfortable seat, or to go to the toilet etc are awful! Not only are a lot of disabilities invisible but not everyone who uses a wheelchair can’t walk at all. Grrrr!

        • scoobford@lemmy.zip
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          6 months ago

          Yeah, that’s it. I was diagnosed when it was still a very recently discovered condition (well…It still kind of is…). As a result, I have some secondary effects from “novel” treatments my parents tried.

  • Starkstruck@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    My personal rule is to never assume someone isn’t handicapped when in a disabled seat or parking etc. Disability comes in many forms, often invisible.

    • AA5B@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      I used to be that guy, all self-righteous that someone could take a handicapped spot without visible disability, until someone called me on it. So embarrassing, but completely deserved and a valuable lesson

      I don’t know if we can generalize from my personal experience but at the time, I leaned more conservative. My outrage was that someone broke the rules, was getting away with something unless someone called them on it. Of course now I understand the result is more important than the rules, that people can have all sorts of physical limitations, visible and invisible, that most people do the right thing most of the time, and “who am I to judge?”

    • Ashyr@sh.itjust.works
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      6 months ago

      My father-in-law has disabled vet plates, which helps avoid confusion, but to look at him you wouldn’t assume he’s disabled.

    • GladiusB@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      This is actually the rule if you are a transit operator. I would however ask someone to not take up 3 seats.

  • adam_y@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    My niece was stopped in the corridor at school by a teacher who shouted “are you deaf or something?”

    My niece removed her hearing aids, slowly.

  • wander1236@sh.itjust.works
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    6 months ago

    This is a crazy story and all, but I can’t help but notice that there are like 5 usernames on-screen for a single post, and I have no idea which is supposed to be the OP.

    • EldritchFeminity
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      6 months ago

      It’s been forever since I saw this format, but I think the way it works is that mygayshoes submitted the story to aerodesy originally, and llamas-and-pancakes reblogged it from chicken-kiev.

      And that was probably the weirdest sentence I’ll write all year.

  • Liz@midwest.social
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    6 months ago

    I have chronic fatigue syndrome, I used to be able to walk at a slow pace for short distances, but anything like the distances involved in grocery shopping was too much.

    One day I went to pick up some tools from a big big box store. The walk from my car to the front of the store was a bit long, so I sat down on the provided electric scooter, the one specifically for disabled people to use. I proceed to get out my phone and mindlessly scroll the internet, giving myself a rest before shopping. After a few minutes an old woman walks through the front doors of the store and confronts me, quite annoyed: “Do you really need that?

    “Yes, actually,” I replied, “but you can have this one and I’ll wait for the next.”

    Before I could even move to get up, she turned around and walked out of the store.

    I still can’t decide if she was too embarrassed to take me up on the offer, or if she had only walked in there to confront me and left the instant it was obvious she was wrong.

  • RBG@discuss.tchncs.de
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    6 months ago

    Long time ago I witnessed a fight over who is more handicapped and thus allowed to sit on the handicapped space in a tram. It was… something.

    • Gabe Bell@lemmy.worldOP
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      6 months ago

      I was so hoping the second image was going to say “I threw my leg at some snarky bastard on the train”

  • Gabe Bell@lemmy.worldOP
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    6 months ago

    This will sound weird when I start, but I promise if you read the whole thing it will make sense.

    A while back (10, 12 years) I had major heart surgery. And so for a few weeks after I had problems doing some things, like walking for more than ten, fifteen minutes at a time, or sitting up right for more than five minutes.

    But the doctors said I needed “exercise” (bastards) so my beloved and I would go out to the shops, and she’d made me walk (because she loved me) and we’d take a wheelchair with us.

    Aside from the whole “walking” thing it was kind of fun, because imagine two people walking down the high street, pushing an empty wheelchair. One of them carrying a towel (and hugging it tightly) and the other walking slowly for no apparent reason. The number of strange and confused looks we got was really hilarious at times. Especially after I got tired and had to sit in the chair so she could push me for a while (which happened a lot, because of - you know - the surgery and the tired) and we saw someone who had seen us a few minutes earlier when I was up and walking about as if I was fine.

    Needless to say I seldom, if ever, gave up my seat on the bus, train, bench or anywhere else if anyone asked. Even if the person asking was 101 years old. I did explain why, and no one argued with me, but sometimes I got some dirty looks for that as well. Because I looked young and fit with no physical injuries.

    It wasn’t forever, and I never claimed to be disabled, and after eight or nine weeks I could bound about like a gazelle on heat. But those first few weeks? We got a lot of strange looks. And I know I said it was hilarious, but only because if I had decided to take offence then I would have whacked the wheelchair into so many people I probably would have been arrested :)

    (The towel, if you were wondering, was for my chest. Having your chest cracked open and put back together hurts a lot, but then if you sneeze or cough oh my sweet fucking god it hurts so much more. Putting a towel against it mitigates it some but still – fucking ow!!)

    • Setarkus.LW@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      if I had decided to take offence then I would have whacked the wheelchair into so many people I probably would have been arrested :)

      Maybe cardiac arrest before the police could arrest you :D

      (No idea if that’s how it works)

    • 0laura@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      The towel thing is very relatable, they gave me one after I got my first pacemaker. I was coughing a lot after the surgery and it was horrible, every time I coughed it hurt so much. I’m lucky that I’ve never been asked to give up my seat in a train, because I’m not sure if I’d have the confidence to say no.

      • Gabe Bell@lemmy.worldOP
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        4 months ago

        Having had this condition since I was born, confidence isn’t a problem at this point. If I think I need to stay seated, I just look them in the eye and say “no”.

        The only time I am willing to not do this (willing not do this? You get the idea) is if I genuinely believe the person asking is in more need than me at the given time, because – you know – the greater good :)

        • 0laura@lemmy.world
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          4 months ago

          same here, kinda. I was born with it but noone knew about it until the first incident when I was 11, and only really started affecting my day to day life a while after that, but I don’t really remember a time before that

  • isles@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    You can learn a lot about a culture by how they treat their disabled people.

  • nifty@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    This is partly why I drive, you don’t have to explain yourself to others or put up with assholes