• Flying Squid@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        32
        ·
        6 months ago

        I can’t speak for other kids, but being honest with mine seems to work pretty well. “Why do I have to put away the dishes?” “Because if you don’t, we won’t be able to wash the dirty ones and then we’ll get roaches. Do you want roaches? No. So put away the dishes.”

        • Passerby6497@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          12
          ·
          6 months ago

          Yeah, that’s the tack I’m taking with mine. No sense in lying because it’s not good for your relationship, and I can’t be bothered to keep track of a bunch of lies.

          • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            8
            ·
            6 months ago

            I didn’t even like doing Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny, but my wife insisted. I’m glad that era is over.

            • soycapitan451@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              4
              ·
              6 months ago

              Feel you. I got accused by my brother in law of being some kind of psychopath for not wanting Santa in the house.

              In their house, my sister is already using the threat of Christmas big brother against any minor hijinks that their kid gets up to.

              I have a three year old, so unfortunately, I have another 4 years of this nonsense ahead of me.

              • Jojo, Lady of the West
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                3
                ·
                6 months ago

                In their house, my sister is already using the threat of Christmas big brother against any minor hijinks that their kid gets up to.

                Oof, that seems a bit much to me. Does she tell stories about the bogeymen or Baba Yaga, too? I’d rather my child be concerned with the actual consequences for their actions rather than the imagined ones

                • Trainguyrom@reddthat.com
                  link
                  fedilink
                  English
                  arrow-up
                  3
                  ·
                  6 months ago

                  There’s some research that says Santa, the Easter bunny, etc. are good for teaching kids skepticism. Plus it’s fun. I’ll often move their stuffed animals so it looks like they were doing something when the kids are asleep so they can get a little bit of magic

                  But, threatening with Santa is actually bad parenting because #1 it’s a bit traumatic of a threat but #2 they’ll figure out damn fast that you’re bluffing. Never threaten a punishment you aren’t prepared to dish out (and never dish out a punishment you wouldn’t feel comfortable explaining to the kid as an adult)

                  • Jojo, Lady of the West
                    link
                    fedilink
                    arrow-up
                    1
                    ·
                    6 months ago

                    Yeah, it’s not the very idea of Santa I’m railing against here, it’s using him as a bogeyman to control behaviour.

            • Amanduh@lemm.ee
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              1
              ·
              edit-2
              6 months ago

              Do you have to be in every single thread picking fights with people over the dumbest shit?

        • Kusimulkku@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          6 months ago

          But you would still be able to wash the dirty ones. This is just a lighter lie (which imo is totally fine).

          • howrar@lemmy.ca
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            5 months ago

            It takes a lot longer to wash if you go that route. If you don’t have enough time for that, then you can’t do it without foregoing your other responsibilities. That qualifies as “can’t”. It’s a lie as much as telling elementary school kids that the sky is blue is a lie. We simplify things because kids don’t have the ability to follow all the complex interactions between everything going on in their lives.

      • Kusimulkku@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        30
        ·
        6 months ago

        I’m not sure if the term “gaslighting” fits here. This just seems like run of the mill lying and manipulating.

        Victims of gaslighting are deliberately and systematically fed false information that leads them to question what they know to be true, often about themselves. They may end up doubting their memory, their perception, and even their sanity.

        Gaslighting would seem like it’d be more that if they knew weekends were a thing befohand then you’d lie that they imagined it all (and that they might even be crazy for having thought that).

        • Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          5 months ago

          Omg! You are such a gaslighting narcissist! Your strawman whataboutism is triggering my OCD, PTSD, and LMNOP!

          Did I miss any classics?