• BeefPiano@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    I’m just giving it to the detective and losing the money. The detective would do more than $100k damage to my house looking. Checking behind the drywall, under the carpet, tearing open my mattresses, opening my appliances, etc.

    Cheaper to save the repair bill.

    Now if they pay to fix everything, I use a hammer to open holes in every wall as a misdirection and hide it in the flooring or framing.

    • Anas@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      If they were paying, I assume they’d pay to restore the house to the state it was in before the detective started. Whatever damage you caused would probably not be fixed.

  • Ragnarok314159@sopuli.xyz
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    7 months ago

    I am handing it to my toddler and saying “this is important, don’t lose it”.

    Detective has a zero percent chance of ever finding it.

  • _sideffect@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Turn off the power to the house

    Stick the paperclip in an outlet

    Turn on power to the house

    When the detective goes to grab the paperclip, he dies, you take the 100k

  • Zulu@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    You’re all fools. This is clealy posted by a detective stumped looking for the paperclip. Stop giving him ideas!

    (Cut up the paperclip with wire cutters, put it in food. Eat food through the day)

  • CarbonIceDragon@pawb.social
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    7 months ago

    How honest is this detective? Perhaps one can simply offer them 50k of the resulting prize money to not look too hard.

  • the post of tom joad@sh.itjust.works
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    7 months ago

    I would buy a few thousand dollars worth of paperclips and hide them all over the house. The detective will have to waste time verifying which paperclip is the right one while i laugh and laugh

  • Godnroc@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Step 1. Mask the item. Change its size, shape, outline, or appearance. In this case, straighten out to be just a bit of wire. Step 2. Fight gravity. Items fall down normally, so hide it somewhere against gravity. Anywhere you couldn’t normally reach is a good start. Step 3. Reach around. Hide the item in a location you can reach, but cannot see. In this case, the air return would be a good place I could reach into and hide a small piece of wire by wedging into the drywall. Step 4. Distract. Take the other boxes of paper clips and scatter them throughout the house. Welcome to the haystack. Step 5. Admit nothing. If they ever claim to have the paper clip, do not check the correct location until the time period has elapsed.

  • Baphomet_The_Blasphemer@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    My house was built in the early 1900s and was used to secretly store and distribute liquor to the town and surrounding areas during prohibition… that money is as good as mine.

    • mosiacmango@lemm.ee
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      7 months ago

      What you dont know is that the detective is from your home town, is 118 years old and was drunk as a skunk during those years.

      Hobbling centurian drunk detective is gonna getcha.

      • Baphomet_The_Blasphemer@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        118 years old? Well, in that case, all I have to do it put the paperclip upstairs. Without one of those stair climber chair lifts, I doubt he’d even be able to get up there to look for it.

  • Pulptastic@midwest.social
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    7 months ago

    Straighten it and snip it into 4 brad nails. Tap them into your molding at random places in the house. Preferably places with unpainted brads in it, such as stained wood molding.

    • mojo_raisin@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Or it’s pigs getting ideas of where people hide things.

      I would assume the pigs are going to find it and make them suffer for it by having to waffle strain a bag of cat shit .

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 ℹ️@yiffit.net
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    7 months ago

    The detective… Is he like a Clouseau or a Columbo type? If the former, I could leave it in plain sight and still get the $100k but if it’s the latter, I might as well confess the moment he walks in the door because there’s nowhere I could hide it he wouldn’t sniff it out and make me incredibly uncomfortable as he toys with me for hours before going in for the kill.

    Or I could just toss it into a drawer with a million other paperclips and he’d never know which one is the one he’s looking for.