"Sometimes people use “respect” to mean “treating someone like a person” and sometimes they use “respect” to mean “treating someone like an authority”

and sometimes people who are used to being treated like an authority say “if you won’t respect me I won’t respect you” and they mean “if you won’t treat me like an authority I won’t treat you like a person”

and they think they’re being fair but they aren’t, and it’s not okay."

-a 15yo autistic girl experiencing ABA therapy

Source

  • KeriKitty (They(/It))@pawb.socialEnglish
    74·
    8 months ago

    Ohey, familiar. Lately getting that particular bit of equivocation from my own abusive “family” who’ve been threatening everything from having me jailed to having me “institutionalized,” calling the cops on me to evict me without notice, physical intimidation… Turns out “no” is a grievous offense to such people. The whole “children as property” thing is vile, absurd that some clearly think giving birth yields the ultimate entitlement, to an entire person and their life. I wonder if not getting diagnosed is a ‘blessing in disguise’ :| Tried for a decade or two to tell BioMom I thought I was ‘on the spectrum’ but always just got bullied out of ever seeing a doc. “There is NOTHING wrong with you!!” she’d say, every time. So now I’m a wreck 'cause two people screwed and entitled themselves to getting by with this crap (and more besides). I hope that person manages better.

    …Could really use help escaping before I become a data point, actually :-\

    • Icalasari@fedia.io
      51·
      8 months ago

      I’d try to avoid getting an official diagnosis until you are free - Autism CAN be used as a way to deem a person incompentent and unable to handle their own living situation, causing a guardian to be assigned power of attourney and control over finances

      Source: I have Autism and thankfully am lucky my mother isn’t insane as she has effective power of attourney

    • TheFriar@lemm.ee
      13·
      8 months ago

      I mean, this is dicey, being online, being (presumably) a young woman. So it might be tough finding support online. But check local anarchist groups in your area. If you’re seriously in that kind of trouble, it might be worth getting out, maybe even with a friends’ family you trust. But if things are dire…do what you can to find a safer place to be.

    • agent_flounder@lemmy.worldEnglish
      12·
      8 months ago

      Ugh that’s terrible.

      I’m tryna think what could be helpful here. Without knowing your situation better, I am not sure which of these apply.

      If there is DV going on, National domestic violence hotline - https://www.thehotline.org/

      Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255, or connect to emergency community services by calling 211.

      The Autism Society’s National Helpline to learn about resources and services in your area - https://autismsociety.org/contact-us/

      I hope something here helps. Really sorry you’re going through this. :(