I have a big brain, so I refuse all microchips. I won’t settle for anything less than a macrochip.
they just shove a laptop in your skull
Like a pringle the size of a pool tarp
Time for a megachip
Unfortunately, Robotron went out of business.
“A small microchip about the size of a postcard”
Personally, I think the technology has great potential. But under capitalism? Fuck no.
Gimme open sourced brain chips and I’m in
You are now required to use the command line just to think.
Can you imagine getting stuck in vim?!
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Yes. Democratically produced and managed
Lol i would say no under any system.
There are legitimate, helpful uses for such technology
Yeah, for example as a coder being able to conjecture code just by thinking it would be magical.
Exactly. And the potential for VR and total immersion development. Thinking things into existence. The art people could make from pure imagination. A real metaverse.
I was thinking more along the lines of “Oh, this will make my legs work again!” or “This chip bypasses the damage done by [horrible brain disease] allowing you to reclaim some significant percentage of functionality”
That is another clear benefit, yes!
to do that with someone’s brain would be a nightmare, stray thoughts would fuck up the code and it would take forever to make anything comprehensible
Meh, I think the concept of interfacing directly with the brain is really interesting, I just don’t know if an Elon company is the one I want doing it.
Of course I’d rather have a brain interface that I didn’t have to implant though.
Even if it’s not Elon Musk. Do you want to have brain surgery every 2 years to implant a new chip because the old one is obsolete?
No, the tech needs to be developed such that regular surgery is unnecessary.
I agree, but even if I did have to replace it, say, once a decade, it would make the surgery much more likely to be a success. When you can control the restriction of blood flow using the bodies own mechanisms, shut off the immune response within that area to remove rejection, and control the pain with targeted painkillers all automatically, the chances of dying on the table go away down. Not to mention the possible benefits of controlling your perspective of time, controlling emotions, having a perfect memory, being able to experience perfect VR, being able to remotely control machines, learning instantly via a download, automated control of replacement/additional limbs, and elimination of exhaustion all make it pretty attractive.
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And now you need to replace usb-c with usb-d, unless you just bought an iPhone 30 then you need a thunderstorm cable (modeled after Steve Jobs dick).
my USB-i’s are up here
Ahh a micro-p connector! It’s essentially a smooth surface with a small nub.
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Cyberpunk style
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If so I am all for it. Just moving my charging mussle.
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Whoa.
If it was from Apple, you’d end up with all your body parts as dongles. Including, uh, your dongle.
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I agree that the concept is interesting, but honestly the damage that could be done with something like that is just not worth it.
With corporate greed you can’t be sure what weird step they decide to do next. And everything they do directly affects you. Not to speak of the possibility of getting hacked and having a weird version of the bee movie play in your head on loop.
Imagine ransomware for your memories
Either I cough up significantly more resources than I have, or they take decades of trauma away from me forever?
Alternative answer: YES!
Companies know best what is good for us and people crave stuff with a micro- prefix, like microplastics (yummy), microtransactions (funny), microbial infections (it’s like a pet), microwaves in your brain (tickles), etc.
^^ the most awesome answer!!! i love consooming!!!
I love my pet bacteria!
I read somewhere that we have more bacteria in/on our bodies than actual cells containing out own DNA, so really, who’s the pet here?
micropenis!
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I mean, that’s how cautionary tales such as Black Mirror are supposed to work
We can hardly get our self-designed computer systems to adequately communicate with each other or function. How confident are you that we can design an appropriate interface with our brain? Something which we still have yet to fully decipher?
In no way do I want venture capitalists and tech bros fucking fumbling around in my brain with hardware designed and constructed by the lowest bidder.
There is a non-zero chance that once they have a chip in your brain, they will find a way to stream ads in to it.
For that reason, I’m out.
Why stream ads when they can more-directly influence you?
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Waking up with an unavoidable craving to watch “OW! My balls!” I’m in!
/s
Hello You, come CloZer
Wait, you mean I can let the guy who invented a shittier version of a subway train (the tunnel has colorful LEDs though) and routinely bitches about safety regulations put computer chips in my brain?! Woah, sign me up for the future!
i cant believe they actually built that tunnel. they filled a nearly inescapable underground tube with cars known for combusting and burning for ages
Not only that, but burning aggressively. I’ve seen my share of car fires, having worked in EMS for 12 years, there’s no such thing as a gentle car fire; if they burned any more aggressively, they’d basically just explode. Well, something about the lithium makes these fires fucking rip and they’re a nightmare to put out. I just did some quick googling, and supposedly Li-ion battery fires are able to supply their own oxygen (holy shit), so you can’t put a lithium battery fire out by smothering it with water or foam. Maybe I’m wrong and someone who isn’t an Internet idiot (it’s me, I’m the idiot) can correct me, but that sounds hella bad, and like of one of those cars caught fire in that tunnel, that fire just flat out isn’t getting put out.
ive heard that too
That’s fine. That thing is halfway round the globe. I’ll be just fine
If I can play videogames in my head while I’m at work, great. If my addict dopamine brain gets highjacked so that I don’t know how to do anything except consume ads then bad.
It will be the latter, and if you complain then people will call you a “privacy nutjob” because it will be considered normal
“Experiencing life without the chip is like stealing content”
I can hear it now
thats so true. “no-ones forcing you to get chipped (unless you want to work or buy anything or enter a mall or …)”
Should a profit-driven company do it?
HELL NO!
Should it be researched so one day it can be done cheaply, safely, healthily, with absolute control given to the person receiving the hardware?
HELL YES!
It’ll never happen. As long as there is any kind of economy there will be some greedy fuck running nike ads in your brain every time you think about shoes.
Given how big corpos are already fucking up the job market due to AI, it’s not such a good idea to go all in with cutting edge technologies right from the get-go
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This isn’t just about the job market
Life is more than work, you fucking drone
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Not under the control of capital
You write like a tween who doesn’t know what they’re talking about
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Friendly reminder that pacemakers can and do get hacked
They usually have no security at all though for some reason, maybe for the same reason viruses spread like crazy in the early days of the internet, people didn’t consider that and assumed everyone was acting in good faith
Making a secure device isn’t reeeally that hard these days, as long as you don’t also have to consider physical access (which, if someone has access to physically probe the chip in your brain, you have bigger problems)
Security is an illusion a determined hacker will get into the brain chip
If the person has a disability and the chip somehow improves the condition, then, under extremely tight legislation, yes. Otherwise, no.
yeah, tons of informed consent too
Literally thw movie “upgrade”
Repo men comes to mind
I can see them being a game changer for the medical industry, but before I’d trust putting them into anyone’s brains they need to be regulated into the ground first.
PC parts can’t even go few years without losing backwards compatibility (e.g. cpu sockets changing every few years). Last thing I need is for my physical body to incompatible with the newest and best stuff because I got a permanent implant when the tech wasn’t as evolved. This will always be the problem with invasive technology in my opinion.
So I have a cat chipped 15 years ago, and she can still operate modern devices with it - open doors, get food from a robot.
Not all tech goes obsolete fast, there are legacy compatibility layers!
There are chips that make cats smart enough to operate doors and robots? That’s so cool!
No, the doors and robots have to be smart enough to operate for the cat.
Source: Have a microchip cat door.
Please don’t insult cats, it’s cats who are smart enough to know how to use their chips! Robots and chips just react as they are programmed.
Cats are already smart enough, they just find it easier to access the technology using their chips.
I think human brain implants might be a bit more complicated than chips for pets.
Yeah but keeping them backwards compatible is gonna be much more important as well
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That’s a cable standard. Imagine being stuck with usb 1.
Even that wouldn’t be unworkable, it would be worse if you’re stuck with the brain equivalent of serial ports just before everyone switches to the USB standard.
