• insaneinthemembrane@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    Nowhere in the article does it say “help out”, that’s on you OP. Dads aren’t helping out when it’s their own family, they’re involved in their family life.

    Edit… Apologies, it does say that. It’s on the author then. Dads are members of their own family, not outside help.

    • tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip
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      4 months ago

      It’s the title from the article. The words help and out are literally the 3rd and 4th words on the page.

    • jeffw@lemmy.worldOP
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      4 months ago

      Did you think I made up the title lol?

      And I get what you mean. But the data seems to say that women are the primary caregivers. If men were to do most of the cooking, wouldn’t we say women are helping in the kitchen? Maybe lawn care is a more realistic example. I think the second party is often described as “helping out”

      • insaneinthemembrane@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        I did, yeah, sorry 😄

        No, when someone on a team is doing their job, you don’t call it helping, you just call it doing your job. I’m not helping by doing laundry, I’m just doing laundry. I’m not babysitting, I’m taking care of my kids. I’m not helping with cooking, I’m making dinner. And so on.

        Women are the primary caregivers because men aren’t doing their part, not because they aren’t helping. It is their job to be a partner and an active participating adult as well as the woman’s.

        The kids help sometimes but the man is doing his job.

  • ShrimpCurler@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    4 months ago

    … the time parents spend with children has gone up for both women and men. Indeed, one study found that today’s generation of moms spend nearly twice as much time with their kids compared to moms 50 years ago.

    As a dad who is struggling to juggle work, kids, housework and mental health all at the same time. I think this is a real problem that needs work on a societal level. Why are both parents needing to spend so much more time looking after their kids? Surely kids weren’t just neglected previously? I’m really not sure whats changed, but there are so many parents under so much stress these days.

      • hitmyspot@aussie.zone
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        4 months ago

        And less organized activity. They might go out and play on the street. Now its off to an organized event or activity. I think there was a lot of supervised neglect before, though. Most kids still did fine but many didn’t. The thing is, a lot of kids are still ending up with mental health issues.

        So I agree. Its a societal problem that needs a societal solution.

    • howrar@lemmy.ca
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      4 months ago

      cognitive load bs

      wat

      If you think this is bs, you either have a magical brain to be envied or you’ve just never actually taken on this work.

      • Omega_Man@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        No. I think everyone has cognitive load. The issue is how people compare cognitive and physical load. For example, in Fair play, annual chores such as buying a birthday card are given the same weight as daily chores such as doing the dishes.

    • Feathercrown@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      Not that I think it’s BS, but:

      It’s not so much who is in charge of childcare, or the time spent with a child, but the questions to ask should be centered around the cognitive labor of a task. In other words, the mental load.