Edit2: It’s a subjective perception I’m talking about. Are you offended? Why?

What’s the matter, why can’t men deal with me being sensitive and emotional? Is it because they struggle with me reminding them of having, too, emotions?

Edit: Do men think I’m weak when I show emotions? If so, why?? Why do women see it as a sign of strength when men are vulnerable, but men don’t seem to get it? Are they/are we dumb??

  • @huginn@feddit.it
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    399 months ago

    This is what is commonly referred to as “toxic masculinity”. That’s the crux of what they’re talking about. It’s not just that men are taught to be dangerous to those around them, it’s that we’re also taught to be hard and lonely Islands that seek no support.

    It’s no way to live and it crushes you over time.

    • @Seudo@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      As opposed to masculinity. Look at Gilgamesh, Achelies, even the godfather of stoicism Marcus Arilius. Historically peak alpha males never muffled their emotions.

      • Digitalprimate
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        29 months ago

        Every (good guy) male character in LoTR, especially Aragorn. All great examples of genuine masculinity.

    • @heird@lemmy.ml
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      19 months ago

      Not quite, I have a group of male friends who are very comfortable with being emotional with each other and I still prefer opening to women because they are much more concerned and able to deal with it, lot of men still don’t know what to do with it.

      • @huginn@feddit.it
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        29 months ago

        You’re still describing the effects of toxic masculinity, just the 2nd order effects rather than the first.

        Why do you think a lot of men don’t know what to do with it? Why do you think a lot of men aren’t concerned?

        It’s not some innate aspect of being a woman: it’s a suppressed aspect of being a human that society has pressed out of men.

        • @heird@lemmy.ml
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          19 months ago

          They aren’t as used to talk about emotions and relationships so it’s easier to go with someone that is.

          It’s no assumptions just facts

          • @Tenniswaffles
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            39 months ago

            Yes. And the reason for that is toxic masculinity. That’s the point they were making. They were explaining the why, not the what.

            • @heird@lemmy.ml
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              19 months ago

              I mean sure but if you want to look more in depth it’s not just toxic masculinity, there’s also toxic femininity involved most men have been hurt by their previous partner who they opened up to and their partner then used it against them or even ridiculed them in front of an audience. Or women around them mocked them for being emotional and crying

              • @Tenniswaffles
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                29 months ago

                What you’re describing is still toxic masculinity and has absolutely nothing to do with toxic femininity. Men that have been hurt by their previous partners or ridiculed for being emotional, is toxic masculinity. This is because men are discouraged from expressing their emotions or seeking support, reinforcing the harmful stereotype that vulnerability is a sign of weakness. Men get hurt by women doing this because of the toxic view many men and women carry about masculinity and male gender roles.

                Toxic femininity on the other hand, is a societal expectation placed on women to conform to traditional gender roles and stereotypes, like being passive, nurturing, and submissive.