Tamsin

Facial hair is incredibly stubborn. I’ve had three sessions so far and a lot has disappeared. But there’s still a lot visible as well but quite patchy. Upper lip and chin are the worst. Like you, I have dark hair and a (very) pale skin.
I do take some solace is seeing less and less hair in my shaver as weeks go by. It is working, but slowly.

The lady at the clinic was honest upfront that she didn’t have a lot of experience with a full removal of facial hair. Most customers for facial hair removal are men who want their beards trimmed.

I wanted to keep my initials for practical reasons. And when in an unrelated conversation the name Tamsin came up I was just smitten with it :)
It sounds playful, is a feminine version of my birth name and doesn’t end with an ‘a’, which for some reason is something that I find important.

My middle name is a straight up female version of the old one with zero creativity :)

God yes. For years and years these were considered the “bad thoughts” and should not be examined more closely.
Shameful fantasies of a happier life… sigh

I had my first laser treatment last week, really looking forward to the time when I don’t need my razor anymore (or at least a lot less often).

I never really tried putting all of this in a list before. It’s always just random stuff popping up when I think about this. Some of these memories are over 30 years old. And I repressed a lot of them.
So this is just a short list. There’s more, but some of it is too personal for me to share.

• Having a phase where I tried wearing masculine office wear (but no ties) and feeling very out of place.
• Never shaving my beard, because I don’t want to see what’s underneath. Using it as a mask to hide behind.
• Hating the general shape of my body
• Feeling very out of place in all-male groups.
• Feeling very in place when spending time with the few female friends that I did have.
• Internally wincing at being called handsome
• Looking enviously at my wife as she squeezes herself in a tight pair of pants, making me wish I didn’t have to deal with all that dangling stuff between my legs.
• Being very involved with helping my wife pick out clothes.
• Playing an online game under a female persona. *Pretending* to be a girl and really enjoying my interactions with everyone. Making a few female friendships that felt genuine and made me happy. And then deleting the whole account for feeling guilty because I believed I was deceiving others :(
• Writing a game module in my teens, wherein all the adventurers were turned into women by a wizard’s curse. And dropping it after a couple of hours when I realize having six women try out different dresses doesn’t make for an exciting fantasy adventure (and was getting uncomfortably close to a truth that I wasn’t ready to face)
• Thinking how nice it would’ve been if I were a lesbian instead.
• Trying out pantyhose and wearing it under my pants when I was a teenager. (Weird when under pants, better on its own when I was home alone :) )
• Also in my teens, fantasizing an entire alternate life as a girl when I was lying in bed.
• Feeling strangely positive when a girl in my class said that I walk like a girl.
• And of course, always choosing a female character when playing games. (With a whole bunch of other in-game activities that could form a list of it’s own)

That’s true :)
But you can overcome your username, I believe in you!

Same here, I really appreciate the posts. But I wouldn’t know where to start if I had to post something myself.
Memes are not exactly something I’m good at.
Though I guess it couldn’t hurt if I left some more comments instead of just lurking.

It is!
Like, this is what baby trucks look like before they grow up :)

I mean, I can’t argue with the little girl though, I like that tall thin glass better as well.
Add a fun straw and some decorations and I’m all in.

I don’t know, I figured crossing fingers is what you do to hope for a good outcome. So… doing it twice is double effect?
And I’m afraid I’ll forget when the time is actually there… I tend to forget a lot… So, let’s just say that this way works best of all :)

Aw, you’re most welcome ❤️ And thanks for clarifying. I’m keeping the fingers on my other hand crossed as well now!
(It’ll make my typing difficult, but sacrifices must be made! :)

Very best of luck to you!!
I don’t know what’s going to happen but I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you :)

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I still remember playing Vampire the Masquerade Bloodlines. Seeing those slender elegant fingers (*my* fingers) picking a lock gave me such a good feeling that I can still recall it up to today.
Of course back then I was totally oblivious and didn’t understand where that feeling came from.

It’s a female version of my birth name, it can be shortened to Tam which is fun, plus I think it sounds cute.

Now if only I were able to actually use it, sigh…