How do you not drip back onto it? Do you use paper too? How is it okay for me to use the same one right after Typhoid Larry? Doesn’t poo go everywhere?
It just seems so weird.
The actual sprayer nozzle sits towards the back of the bowl and sprays up at an angle so any dripping is going straight down into the bowl not landing on the sprayer nozzle.
It’s getting fresh water, not recycling bowl water, I suppose there could be some small risk if Larry has explosive diarrhea all over the nozzle, but its probably no worse than if you have any splashback after using a regular toilet after him. Most of the models I have used also have a self-cleaning feature that will have the nozzle rinse itself (they still do need to be actually cleaned periodically of course)
There is a little bit of splashing, unless you’re abnormally small and skinny though most of it is probably just going to get your butt and staying in the toilet, once in a while I’ll get a couple drops on the front of the toilet seat and I’m pretty sure that’s just over-spray shooting directly between my legs, not poop water splashing off of my ass
I think this is the best response. So many people are answering a seemingly angry way to a question that seems sincere. It’s clear OP didn’t get how it worked and just wanted some information and wasn’t saying it was a terrible idea.
Also a lot of typhoid and stomach flu type pathogens don’t spread butthole to butthole, they spread via the “fecal-oral” route so… that happens in situations like someone took too small a slice and touches your food (or receipt that you ate to prove they liked your gift) without washing their hands properly.
Okay but are you just using toilet paper to dry afterwards? And does just water actually get it all? You’ve still got to get in there a bit right?
A few things.
- On mine there’s a little guard around the sprayer and it peeks down under it when in use. There’s also a cleaning mode.
- I do use a some toilet paper to dry. Less than I would if I wiped. One day I’ll upgrade to one of the fancy units with a dryer.
- I don’t know about other people but I move around a bit to make sure that the spray gets everything, including “in there a bit”. If you dab to dry and your tp has anything other than water on it you didn’t do a good enough job spraying.
It depends on your bowel movements and how much fiber you eat. I still have to wipe a little after the water, but far less than without. Others, drying is enough.
After using one for a while now, it seems so uncivilized not using one now.
Most people do, but a couple squares to pat dry is probably less than you’d use otherwise. Some fancier models have blow dryers. Personally, I won’t lie, I’m probably going to sit on the toilet for a few minutes scrolling through Lemmy on my phone after I’ve done my business so I tend to just air/drip dry.
I have some pretty basic models, and they do a pretty good job getting everything clean, they have a pretty powerful jet. Definitely a lot better than I’ve ever been able to do with TP.
Um…you use more than normal not less. It’s not like you want shit splattering all over, wiping is still necessary.
Except you don’t, I’m now using damn close to 0 TP since, like I said, I mostly tend to drip dry.
I suppose YMMV depending on the kind of shits you take, and maybe the geometry of your ass or the water pressure of your bidet, maybe your butt is shaped in such a way that stuff is splattering all over, but that certainly has not been my experience.
Okay but are you just using toilet paper to dry afterwards?
Some have built in dyers. Even with it, sometimes it feels a small dab helps some more, but it’s not really necessary. Also, that water should be clean at that point… Do you perfectly dry your ass with a towel after showering? Etc
And does just water actually get it all?
Usually. You can also run them more than once. Some have “pressure” settings. Some move back and forth. And you can always check with paper, and see if you need to change something or run another cycle.
You’ve still got to get in there a bit right?
I’ve never had to. Occasionally run a second cycle, but no.
Of course you use tp afterwards, your ass is now soaking wet. Wipe, rinse, then wipe again.
Having my ball hair blasted with deflected ass water sounds not so great if I’m being completely honest
My dude, your ball hair lives inches away from your butthole, maybe not even that far depending on how saggy your balls are, how long your hairs are, and how supportive your underwear is. I promise you that nothing that’s splashing onto your balls is any worse than what’s already there.
Having my ass hair blasted with deflected ass water sounds not so great if I’m being completely honest
Worse than smearing shit all over it with a dry piece of paper and hoping it comes clean?
Yes
It’s not that powerful of a jet of water. I mean, I’m sure there is some, but if you’re doing it right, only the parts you want to get wet are getting wet. Besides, the alternative is like using a paper towel to clean peanut butter from a shag carpet.
And the nozzle itself is protected by a little shield so even explosive diarrhea won’t get on it
As a lady - it shoots water forward from the back to the front? That seems like a prescription for BV and bladder infections. We had one but it was a handheld sprayer, that was good except in the winter.
Mine has a nozzle adjust so that you can do either front to back or just back.
Most of the models I have used also have a self-cleaning feature that will have the nozzle rinse itself (they still do need to be actually cleaned periodically of course)
this. the geberit toilet that I have will automatically clean the nozzle before and after use.
many (probs most new ones) have a uv light that’s inside the retracted nosel casing which sterilises it between uses, so even typhoid Larry would not be an issue.
There’s a lot of options out there, I’ve seen some really fancy ones with a lot of bells and whistles, but my personal experience is that most of the ones I see people buying and installing are pretty basic mechanical devices hooked up to a water line with no electrical components. Just pieces of plastic and/or metal being acted upon by other pieces of plastic/metal and water pressure.
Most people are retrofitting them into existing bathrooms, often they don’t have convenient electrical lines/outlets close enough to their toilet for a clean-looking install and don’t care enough to run them, and needing to recharge or replace batteries in their toilet isn’t something they’re particularly interested in doing (I fall into this category myself)
Personally I have 3 toilets with 3 bidets, all basic cold water models with no other features. None of them have convenient power, I’d have to run a cord to the outlet by the sink, or run a new outlet for them. It’s certainly doable in all 3 cases, but more work than I care to put into it, and I’m too stubborn and cheap of a DIY homeowner to hire an electrician for something I could do myself. One of them is close enough to the sink that I could run a hot water line to it without too much bother, but that bathroom is pending a renovation so I’m waiting to see how things look when I get into that before I do it (that bathroom is also furthest from the water heater, so you usually have to run the water for a while before it starts coming out hot from the tap, so kind of less than ideal and maybe not worth it)
On that note, cold water bidets are a little unpleasant at first, but you get used to it really quickly, and if you’re kind of a fat sweaty guy like me they’re actually pretty refreshing once you’re used to them.
yeah we have two toilets, both with bidets, one is a cold water blast retro fit and the other is a fancy Japanese one with power that does everything except buy you dinner afterwards.
I really don’t understand the western reluctance for them and their penchant for poo smeared butt holes. one you go bidet it seems primitive to do anything else.
My toilet bidet, the nozzle is covered when not spraying.you can still use a toilet brush and everything.
I don’t need to defend power washing my butt to you. You need to defend mashing shit around your buttskin through microscopically thin and flimsy sheets of paper to me.
noone was talking about defending stuff, rather explaining.
tbh, it’s kinda unclear to me as well how do you use a bidet properly, I mean you walk around with shitty hole in your bathroom, when do you flush or clean up the toilet if neccessary…?
or if it’s built into the toilet, you stand up still drippy hole? do you use soap? when and how? you dry your butt still sitting on top of your poo?
see? lots of unclarity here.
I’m thinking about upgrading my porcelain throne anyway…
The days are either part of the toilet, or attached to the toilet using the screws in the back that hold your toilet lid down. You don’t waddle around at all. It’s the same toilet you do your business squirt your butt and if you stay there for a few minutes to drop dry, you don’t have to use any paper products whatsoever
In Europe and South America, it’s normally stand alone, not installed in the bowl
I can’t recommend integrated bidets strongly enough.
I’m the opposite. Having used both I far prefer the stand alone versions.
I am thunderstruck, honestly. Do you mind sharing what you prefer about it?
More water pressure and less generally gross
I mean, it’s not like anyone on planet earth just takes a single sheet and wipes with that…right?
I have not checked.
Can you explain washing your hands? It seems so weird. Doesn’t the water just drip back on the sink? Do you dry your hands with paper after?
What seems weirder is using paper alone to wipe away feces from your body and doing nothing else during a bowel movement to clean yourself. I cannot understand my own countrymen’s aversion to using them. Squirting your asshole with water does’t make you gay.
Why are you making out like OP is stupid for asking questions about something they clearly just don’t know much about? You could have just answered the questions.
Op didn’t even respond to a single comment here i.e. They are just venting about the ‘weirdness’ of a bidet and not actually looking for answers - just looking to validate their stupid opinion. So calling them out on that is the correct response.
But that wouldn’t make him edgey.
Squirting your asshole with water does’t make you gay.
Are you sure though? I’m scared to test this theory.
I remember reading a comment thread on reddit about a guy who discovered his friend refused to wash his ass crack in the shower because he thought it was gay.
I definitely worked with that guy.
If you’re scared of being gay you might actually just be gay.
In all seriousness though, everyone should get a hand bidet installed on their toilets ASAP. Once you squirt your asshole with water to clean the poop off you will immediately realize how disgusting you’ve been up until that moment in your life using only flimsy ass ass paper to wipe shit off your body.
I swear, Puritanism really did a number on North America.
not just NA. it fucked up cultures all around the world, thanks to colonization. the states are just the most successful colony.
And the loudest
Do you dry your hands with paper after?
That or with a towel.
Ahh, I see.
When using a bidet, you must always be face-down ass-up with the sprayer above you.
In the US only the rich have bidets. Do you have an electrical outlet right near your toilet? I don’t want cold water spraying my ass and getting an outlet installed near the toilet in an apartment I don’t own is very expensive.
- Your anus can’t feel temperature that much so cold water hitting it really isn’t that big of a deal.
- Warm water bidets don’t use electricity, they use a hot water tap from the near by (and generally easily accessible) bathroom sink. Sure you might need to drill a hole in a cabinet but it’s not outrageously inaccessible or expensive to setup. You just need to watch like 2 plumbing youtube videos.
- I live in the US. I am not rich. I have a bidet—it is a hand nozzle attached to my toilet’s water tap that cost $30.
As someone who has one of the non electric bidets installed and was afraid of having a puckered asshole the first time I used it, it’s not that cold. And it’s so worth it. I can’t go back and will have a bidet everywhere I live in the future.
Well maybe I will look into them. Thanks
No pressure (ha!) of course.
I’m going to explain how an Italian bidet works, I don’t know if you’re referring to some other kind of bidet (e.g. the pressure washers).
You do your thing, then you lightly clean yourself with paper. Don’t waste too much paper, just one pass or two will suffice.
Then you get up from the toilet bowl and go on the bidet. In Italy, it’s always next to the toilet bowl so you don’t have to walk around like a maniac. The best way to sit on the toilet is to “ride it” as if it was a horse (so you face the water).
You open the water, maybe you wait for it to become warm (it depends on the kind of heating system you have in your home, sometimes it takes longer to come out warm). Then you get some soap (we use a specific kind of delicate liquid soap that we call “intimate soap” in Italian). You apply the soap to your private parts and you rinse using the water.
After you’ve finished cleaning, you dry youself using a personal towel. This is important: you don’t share your bidet towel with anybody. We usually use a smaller kind of towel.
And that’s how an Italian uses a bidet.
You left out the bow at the end.
would this be like, only in your own home? or would you be carrying the bidet towel around with you when in public?
You always carry both your towel and your bidet wherever you go. This is very important.
Is this the towel suggested in the hitchhikers guide?
No of course only in your home. If you’re visiting someone else for some days they’ll give you a bidet towel. If you’re just outside well… you’ll just use your toilet paper. Some people will use the bidet anyway and dry with toilet paper, but that’s a bit annoying.
We don’t poo in public toilets.
“Walk around like a maniac” is an amusing turn of phrase to me.
And a nice username as well
Thanks ;)
“Walk around like a maniac” is an amusing turn of phrase to me.
You can get a simple one that goes on your toilet. Turn dial, water hits, you pat dry and feel a million times cleaner. Most people that try them once get it. Just ask yourself if you would use water if you knew poop was smeared on any other part of your body
I mean, you share a toilet bowl with Typhoid Larry already. The bidet isn’t going to be worse than that!
And honestly, they’re the best thing ever! Sometimes it drips, but that’s just like getting out of the shower, except with much less water. You can wipe off the drops with toilet paper, or you can just not bother. I’ll do that if I’m going straight to bed for example, or if I’m putting on running gear etc that I’m going to sweat into anyway
I reeeeeally recommend drying off after. Anyone who is prone to UTIs like I am, please dry off each time…
Another win for the male-ocracy
I hadn’t thought about that, but it seems I’ve been lucky so far
For reference I have this one: https://a.co/d/94y5ID3
You use it while still seated so the water drips back into the toilet bowl; no mess there
I do use paper too to dry or further cleaning if needed
If you look at the 3rd picture on the link above you’ll see that the sprayer lowers down while spraying and then retracts back behind a guard; I’ve never seen the guard or sprayer themselves get dirty from general toilet use
No, the water pressure isn’t so intense that it would scatter debris everywhere
I first used one at a friend’s house and found it does a far better job cleaning compared to just paper alone and would certainly recommend giving it a try
But how do you dry your butthole
They are butt showers.
You poop first in the toilet and if it was a messy one you use some paper (not all countries’ pipes can handle paper though). Then you go to the bidet and clean there. Let the jet hit your hole and wiggle a bit if need be. Use some paper to dry off. Woman will also wash their privates with the bidet after peeing.
In India and China you also got a hose or just a hose in many places. That requires a bit more finesse due to the risk of giving yourself a shower if you don’t aim well. You might even just get a cup which you fill and use to wash yourself manually. You need to carry some liquid soap and sanitizer when traveling in areas that might require this and keep your fingernails cut short. In remote areas it is a hole next to the animal pen and you bring your own paper.
I got a bidet attachment for my home during the pandemic due to the severe toilet paper hoarding that was going on.
I love my bidet. Since the bidet came into my life I feel unclean after using a non-bidet toilet, even after using wet wipes. Imagine never having monkey-butt (an itchy asshole}. No more skid marks either.
Others have described the normal use of a bidet. I’m here to tell you about advanced bidet techniques. The first is learning the mini enema. You need a bidet with a water jet nozzle. Position yourself so the jet hits the bullseye. Slowly raise the water pressure until it starts filling your rectum with water. This is the hard part - relax. Your initial response will be to clinch shut the ol’ brown eye. When full, turn off the water and let loose in the bowl. Repeat as needed. This cleanses the rectum and prevents those times when you feel like there’s still some poop up inside that won’t come out (because there is). It also prevents anal leakage that produces butt butter.
Once you’ve mastered the mini enema, you can use the technique to battle constipation. Squirt some water in that stuffed up bunghole, fill up, hold it in, stand up, then sit down and enjoy the relief.
It also provides immediate relief from a burning irritated bowel caused by eating Atomic Hot Wings from Wingstop.
Finally, the feminine wash setting is not just for women! After a sweaty workout where you don’t have time for a proper shower, use it to wash your balls. That prevents itchy balls and the embarrassment of being caught scratching them.
Imagine never having monkey-butt (an itchy asshole}. No more skid marks either.
Can’t say that I’m having this when just using wipes… Maybe wipe a little better?
Once you’ve mastered the mini enema
And you must shout the name of the technique you’re about to use, otherwise you’re far from having mastered it
Because it sprays at an angle, not directly up
There are a number of videos on how to use a bidet but one of the best resources is Tushy.
I didn’t see any heated bidet options there, do they have one? I’d like to retrofit my toilets with warm water bidets.
Some have heated seats. I had it before, and now don’t, I don’t miss it even though it was nice. Not worth the money in my opinion.
I don’t care about the seat, that’s just a quick second. I want the water heated. Cold toilet tank water may be clean, but I moved to the most southern part of California for a reason. I super babby hate the cold.
i had heated water on that last one as well. Unlike the heated seat I don’t miss it. You can get it if you want, but I don’t reccomend it.
Is the lack of recommendation due to expense or poor design/implementation?
expense. I don’t have it now and don’t miss it.
Fair enough, thanks for the info.
You have basically two choices for the nice, high end ones that install on toilets. Biobidet and Toto. I went with the former, but either one makes excellent models.
Note that to use it properly, it’s best to get an outlet under your toilet tank. They do have to plug in.
Toto means pussy in Spanish.
Dude just get a bidet thing that you can install under your toilet seat. Just get one, don’t question it! Best 30 € I’ve ever spent!
The thing is that with this you don’t have to clean your ass anymore, it just does it by itself! You don’t have to do anything anymore 💁♂️ and it’s really not strange to use it. One may think it would feel strange but you’ll see. Just get one! Everyone should have one 💁♂️😂
if you got poop on your skin would you use water or a piece of paper to wash it off
Piece of paper to smear it around more like
It’s a shower, but just for your ass
