“this simple meal only requires about 5 minutes of prep work”
Proceeds* to list off atleast half an hours worth of shit to do prior to cooking
Simple meal
Requires a dehydrator and 4 different types of potato
This is my kind of simple.
That soundtrack is everything, thank you for sharing this work of art
Thank you for reminding me of this. I saw this years ago and it was so good.
Hey there wildcats…
I still use that sometimes lol
A gem in an ocean of turds.
Pain
Even better when it involves using ingredients that I don’t have at that point. So going out to buy them is no longer lazy.
The prep time for today’s recipe is 15 minutes. Now it’s 15 minutes for me the “professional” chef who cooks like this everyday. Jambalaya takes a real long prep time. Especially when you did one too many marijuanas.
Proceeds*
*Proceeds
Step 1: Unwrap processed cheese slice and put in mouth. Repeat as necessary.
You’re spending time unwrapping? I refuse to buy the individually wrapped ones because that’s way too much work.
I just eat the wrapper.
I like the plastic wrapped shits after.
Nice, clean and doesn’t leave poop ghosts in the toilet.
The cheese is also still edible inside
That’s the best part about eating corn, you can take it out of the toilet the next day and just give er a quick rinse and you got a nice little snack!
Likely 3x more nutritious.
The “deli style” American cheese is far superior, anyway.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=TMR8a8nCM4c&pp=ygUYc2ltcHNvbnMgYW1lcmljYW4gY2hlZXNl
I’d say my lazy meal is a Maple Bulgogi Raymeon
Mmm… 64 slices of American cheese…
[Camera fade in on a full-body shot of me standing in my kitchen, my hands tented smartly in front of me.]
Hi everyone, welcome back to my food channel. You don’t want to cook a full balanced meal every night, sometimes you just want something quick! So today I wanted to show everyone my go-to lazy meal.
[I rip open a bag of semi-sweet chocolate chips with my teeth and just start pouring them vertically into my mouth. Many of the chocolate chips do not go into my mouth, they just fall straight down, bouncing off the floor and out of frame. Some get caught in the folds of my clothing, occasionally rolling off onto the floor and bouncing out of frame. Most unsettling are the ones that fall into my mouth and then are carried out again by their own chaotic momentum, covered in microscopic flecks of my saliva, sticking to my shirt or splattering on the floor.]
[This continues for much longer than you’d think, as I empty the entire 1-pound bag without stopping.]
[I release the empty plastic bag, which drifts to the floor. The camera zooms in on my eyes, where tears are just starting to be visible. Fade out.]
I smash that like and subscribe.
Sponsored by RayCon Shadow VPN
Now go make this vid before I do
YouTube rewards similar channels, you can help each other
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out of all the entries here, this is the only one I’d watch.
Subscribed
Man, this was an experience.
Y’all are way too productive…
And lazy doesn’t necessarily mean quick either. Frozen pizza has gotta be the real winner here.
let it cool a bit and fold it over. eat it like a big sammich. don’t even have to dirty the pizza cutter.
Call it a calzone and suddenly you’ve circled back to fancy diner.
Who the hell calls a calzone “fancy dinner”?
Someone who would eat a frozen pizza all folded up.
Eat it frozen. Way quicker, way lazier.
Making pizza and freezing it sounds like a lot of work to me…
I’m not sure I know how to cook anything that doesn’t start with a chopped onion.
Your pudding must be weird.
I’m a savory kinda guy.
I would hate to try the oatmeal too.
If you mean pudding a diced onion on his junk, yeah I’d have to agree with you there
After it gets translucent, add a knife-tip’s worth of minced garlic from the jar… Some salt and pepper.
From there you’re making anything from soup to pasta to breakfast to Mexican, Asian, Italian…
Better yet, mince a couple fresh cloves with one of those garlic smasher things
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And it’s a bitch to clean
True hahahaha
I think this person is upset that other people are less lazy about cooking in general than he is
Not really, he is just explaining that some veggies add a lot of taste for very little effort. People watch cooking programmes and think that you have to spend an hour cutting stuff up to make it worthwhile. Or that you have to spend a fortune on herbs to make it taste nice. When the reality is that just adding a single vegetable can do wonders for the taste. Onions are just the most versatile and one of the quickest to prep/cook.
Almost everything sauteed or simmered starts out with at least onions, sure. I interpreted it, though, as “this person saying he takes no effort but they’re chopping vegetables and cooking something vs throwing some stuff in the microwave”. Hard to know with no context.
Grilled cheese, chicken and/or cheese quesadilla, butter-noodles, tomato soup, hot dogs / brats, etc.
But you can put onion in ALL of those!
All except the grilled cheese, because then it’s a fucking melt you donkey
I got this great lazy spaghetti snack recipe.
- Take out some pieces of spaghetti from the box.
- Eat it.
Italians would like to know your location
Italians are the laziest cooks. They took half their culinary tradition from Asia, and the other half from America.
New theory dropped, Italian cuisine is actually American (?)
America as in the Americas. Tomatoes came to Europe after Columbus.
Saying Italian cuisine is American because they use tomatoes… Is like saying American cuisine is indo-europ-africa-asian because they use pigs, cows and wheat.
Yes.
Italians are the laziest cooks.
Someone never made pasta by hand.
Top tip: Dip it in syrup before eating it.
Real lazy meal? Uncooked top ramen, the cheaper the better.
Recipe:
-
Smash ramen noodles
-
Open bag
-
Pour seasoning into bag of broken noodles
Congrats, you have ramen chips.
Yeah, but first you have to dip your pinky in the seasoning and taste it like a tv cop testing drugs.
A real ramen head snorts it.
SHOOT IT, COWARD.
For safety reasons, this is a joke.
Huh interesting. Here in Hong Kong there’s a snack that is exactly that. It’s basically the exact same thing as ramen, but it’s meant to be eaten directly out of the bag and the seasoning is already mixed in.
Reminds me of those old bay goldfish that PF sold for a little bit last year. I admit, my purchases of cheddar goldfish and old bay have been up since that event.
That sounds absolutely disgusting and at the same time kinda good
That’s exactly how it tastes too
Gotta hold the bag closed and shake it up after you pour the seasoning in.
My teeth hurt just thinking about it.
You can also deep fry it
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Here’s my go go lazy meal:
*drinks water*
drinks coffee
Did you know caffeine is an appetite suppressent?
Yup my version of this is a cup of tea.
*takes nap*
Mine is chicken Alfredo. The only part that isn’t just waiting is when I make the sauce which only takes like 7 minutes.
But what if the lazy meal is just one raw onion?
Then just eat it like an apple.
What are you, some kinda workaholic?
Then just eat it like an apple.
Like the Grinch in the movie lol
Or maybe they love the texture of onion rice! It looks like rice but it tastes like and is onions!
Like a previous PM of Australia, Tony Abbott.
Onion spätzle!
The medieval onion recipe, where you roast it in the oven, is actually delicious and super easy as well
Nah, just former Australian PM Tony Abbott, the absolute nonce: https://youtu.be/8tqXSPkDbX4
I have been found drunk in the middle of the night peeling away at an onion by hand and dipping it into a fast food bbq…
Really nice with a bit of ketchup. Just eat it like an apple. 👌
Could be onions and bell peppers for a quick and dirty sandwich paste, I know you can get them together at some grocery stores
My first thought after reading that was “yeah I guess eating just an onion is a bit weird”
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This is why we in the UK, the King’s of lazy food, have perfected the art of the “picky tea” slap two kind of beige food on a baking tray, shove it in the oven for 15-20 minutes at 200°, big dolop of your preferred dipping sauce on the side, or some baked beans if you’re feeling lush, lovely jubbly.
The beige banquet!
15-20 minutes? Who has time for that?
What is, uhh, beige food? I’ve never heard that phrase before lol
Things like fish fingers, chicken dippers, turkey dinosaurs, hash browns, potato waffles, even chips.
I understood some of those words!
There’s different levels of lazy. If you can’t bring yourself to chop an onion every once in a while, you probably just need to practice it a bit or something, because that shit isn’t hard.
I don’t think anybody says chopping an onion is hard, but it also means you’re going to be cooking for about an hour.
A lazy meal is like beans on toast, or something you slap in the microwave for three minutes.
Sorry, but it doesn’t take an hour to cook an onion. If you do it often enough you can chop an onion finely in less than 2 minutes. You can generally just throw onions into whatever container you are cooking in. Sharp knives are a must, and watch a video on how to cut veggies. Along with a cheap knife sharpener ofc.
Onions are the bread and butter for taste in my cooking. A quick web search for best herbs to add to whatever it is you are cooking will change how you cook and eat immensely. Buying a couple of jars of herbs a month and increase your repertoire bit by bit. I realise not everyone can do this ATM with the cash flow crisis that is predominant. But for those who can spend an extra £5-6 a month, it will change how you love your food.
My tea tonight(yes, its called tea where I live) - Chicken that is busy marinating in rosemary and thyme, with onions and peppers. Along with my own version of a Ratatouille that I made yesterday mixed into pasta. I am not a clever cook or anything like it. I just cook a small number of things very well.
The best recipe I have come across so far is lamb chops. Make a mixture of sage, rosemary, thyme, coriander and cumin (1.25ml equally for each one). Put them in a small glass and mix it up, then this will coat 3 lamb chops. Fry in Olive oil in a lidded frying pan.
If you have no lid for your frying pan, I would really recommend getting one. They are easy to buy from Amazon and save a lot of energy. They also keep a lot of the flavours in the pan. Add a couple of chopped garlic cloves while frying. At 3-4 minutes before removing the chop add finely chopped onions.
It doesn’t take an hour to cook an onion.
But unless you’re that guy from The Office, usually an onion goes with other things. And those other things are what takes the time.
I think we just have very different ideas of “lazy”.
Seriously, an onion is all you need to spice up a meal. No herbs or fancy stuff, stick an onion into your food as part of your 5/10/15 or whatever it is these now per day. BBC good food guide on the benefits onions.
- Rich in antioxidant compounds
- Contain anti-cancer compounds
- Are antibacterial
- May support heart health
- May support bone health
- May support gut health
- May help regulate blood sugar
- May support the respiratory system
- May protect the digestive system
- May help with weight management
I only mentioned herbs because they are a no brainer with exceptionally low effort.
- Gives wife crippling stomach cramps.
So I’ll pass.
I find the texture generally unpleasant, unless it’s crispy onions (and I mean actual crispy onions, not slightly burnt but still slimy onions), and I’ll assume the process of deep frying the fuck out of them and putting them on a burger nullifies any health benefits.
Obviously if a food gives you a reaction then don’t eat it.
I find the texture generally unpleasant
I am in exactly the same boat. I cannot eat onions unless they are finely cut. Onions that are finely cut give out more flavour anyways. It is all about learning how to cut an onions finely and quickly. This is similar to how I do it. I do downward cuts to the centre of the onion. I never do the horizontal cuts that I have seen a lot do. To me that is just asking for trouble. I also cut my slices very finely. I like the bit of leaving the end on the onion. That is a new one to me.
Bruh… it’s about the implication not the onion
What implication can you take from adding an onion?
That you’re going to be doing actual cooking, rather than just warming things up.
I can’t think of many things you would warm up for an hour.
This response of yours implies you are either stupid or trolling, which is it? I hope for your sake it’s the latter.
I am sorry I only speak English. Try Google translate. You are making no sense whatsoever.
I see so stupid it is.
Cool onion flex bro
Why in the holy hell would that mean an hour? Not all cooked onions are fully caramelized.
You sautee an onion, then you cook something else, then you have to wash a pan… Fuck, I’m tired just writing out the list.
Never. My goto are Patties - my freezer is stocked with burgers, turkey burgers, salmon burgers, veggie burgers.
You start by chopping an onion and peppers …. While the patty is cooking on grill, skillet, griddle, whatever. Have some beer. Grab a plate, open a bun, throw on some prewashed lettuce, throw on the onions. Have more beer. Melt a slice of cheese on top for the last 30-60 seconds and throw it on your bun.
Done eating in 5 … 4 … 3 … 2 …… 1
Quesadilla, especially of your have a glass top oven, you just slap that tortilla straight on the element and flip it a few times before adding cheese and folding it. 5 min, no mess.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=dCGS067s0zo
Under 2 minutes with exposition.
I don’t mind the chopping, washing and cleaning up is the dealbreaker for actually cooking for a lazy meal.
My lazy hot meal is usually something with noodles or rice, like jar sauce bolognese or egg rice. Bonus if you eat it straight out of the pot.
My advice: Eat the plates, man.
↑ This guy trenchers.
I just clean while I cook. Some things barely require more cleaning than a quick wipe and rinse with a drop of soap, like a knife or cutting board.
fuck it, frozen meatballs and spaghetti-os time
replace spaghetti-os with chili or whatever tf else you find in your pantry
Fr, if it involves that much prep then it’s officially gourmet
if it dirties more than the dish it’s eaten from.
Why don’t you already have chopped onion in your fridge for when you’re feeling lazy? Be kind to your future self when you have the time and motivation. I chop a sweet onion or two every weekend and use it throughout the week on whatever. Gotta do peppers a couple times a week though. I put that stuff in everything.
Why don’t you already have chopped onion in your fridge for when you’re feeling lazy?
I don’t have a pre-chopped onion in my fridge for the same reason why you probably don’t have 20 different kinds of pen refills, inkwells and nibs to go with your collection of dozens of various pens. I do a lot of writing. I don’t do much cooking.
What if you wrote about cooking though?
I mean, I’d still have a bunch of pens and no onions.
Promise?
Those are rookie numbers
1 or 2 onions a
weekmealRule #1: keep chopped onion in fridge
to make a lazy meal, first you must lazily create the universe…
Sagan is missed. Really enjoyed watching the Cosmos series. Something about the way he speaks and his anecdotes…rare person who can communicate to any audience
Resting on a Sunday. What a lazy work ethic that god fellow had.
