Show transcript
Screenshot of a Tumblr post by nongunktional:
when i first heard about the male loneliness epidemic i was like oh yeah close camaraderie and bonding between men is often discouraged in favor of competition or, if not discouraged, at least filtered through a lens of individualism that precludes deep connections. and then i learned what people meant by it (men arent getting laid) to which i say skill issue
to all the men out there not getting laid: try less hard to get laid and try more hard to be an enjoyable and relaxing presence
I feel like this type of reply to the male loneliness epidemic (or y’know just the loneliness epidemic, since loneliness has been on the rise independent of gender) really does not give a shit about the people that experience loneliness by reducing them to the most horrible and loud of subset of them.
Sure, there are incels that will twist and turn every societal tragedy into why they are victims and deserve to keep hating women. But by listening to them and reducing the entire problem to hahaha, the women haters are getting what they deserve, you are just hurting everyone else.
I think it is funny how you post this, then in the comments deny that this is the type of opinion someone like you, a proud leftist feminist have, and that it is actually most men who think like this.
depends on your circles. in feminist and leftist circles, it usually means the first but most men outside of those circles use it just to mean “im not getting the dates i am ENTITLED to 😡"
If that is the case, why did you make this post? What was the purpose of your post if this isn’t how you think about lonely men? What did you want to achieve with it? I can tell you, that you’re not going achieve anything positive.
I assume you’d like to be treated with respect and compassion yourself since you have that blåhaj attached to you. That respect and compassion is a two way street.
The fact that SOME men feel entitled to women doesn’t mean that most men think or feel like that. The loneliness many men (and women for that matter) feel is very real and it is a far bigger and more complex issues than just “lawl, can’t get laid”.
I personally know what it is like to be mistreated by very bad men. It left deep scars on me that I have to carry for life. However, I promised myself that I would not become a man hater back when I was going through my trauma. I refused to let a couple of asshole determine how I would meet the world and the men in it. It would be unfair to those who had never done a thing to me and it would be unfair to myself because I was better than that.
You too are better than this and you either have to start treat all people with respect and compassion if you want the same in return or you need to own that it is in fact not “most men” who think like this, it is you who think like this. Stand by your convictions and own them or change course because you know that what you’re putting out into the world right now is ugly and reductive.
OK, but…no? That’s not what people are talking about with the male loneliness epidemic. They’re talking about how an inability to connect with their peers on a more than superficial level, coupled with a lack of older male role models, are causing Gen Z and Millennial men to report extremely high levels of loneliness.
It’s tangentially related to, “getting laid,” as many of these men are driven towards misogynistic monosphere influencers who make sexual conquest a measure of self-worth, but that’s a symptom of the problem, not the totality of it. Also, some people debate the existence of the loneliness epidemic altogether, but no one defines it as, “men aren’t getting laid.”
That isn’t what people mean by it. Loneliness means loneliness.
Imagine what would happen if somebody said this about women. Are you lonely, ladies? Have you tried being enjoyable and relaxing? And you should smile more!
Haha! Hey, look! Men expressing feelings in comments and getting attacked by alphas and women for doing so! Next post on askmen - “Why are men so closed in and do not share their feelings?”
Maybe some are making it about getting laid, but overwhelmingly most men struggling with it have completely different reasons for why it is happening, in many cases outside of their power.
no, make loneliness epidemic is exactly what’s described in the first post. societal norms mostly hinder men from forming meaningful friendships with other men, and women as well. they’re discouraged from expressing feelings (maybe other than aggressive ones) and being vulnerable. i don’t know how you can form any relationships without doing either. and turns out you really can’t. hence a lot of men feel lonely.
I am in a relationship, but also lonely. I would like someone to share relationship-problems with for when they occur every once in a while. But it’s hard.
Don’t believe all the crap you see on TikTok and talk to actual people about their problems. Please.
Going anywhere in public to socializing is expensive as hell, third places are dead, and the primary way people meet potential SOs is through apps whose purpose isn’t to make anyone happy but to extract maximum value from them.
There are people who are off the deep end, yes, but the answer isn’t to attack them like this. That’s never going to snap anyone out of it, and there really are huge societal problems that are resulting in people withdrawing, which is obviously bad for their mental health.
This is one of those “people hate every piece of capitalism, but refuse to connect the dots to see the picture” things.
Yes exactly.
I found a local private club where drinks are cheap and there’s tons of regular customers. Feels like what the Cheers bar seemed like on TV.
That sounds cool as fuck
It’s pretty great. Everyone is really chill and if you just want to find a comfy chair and read you can do that, too.
I can’t wait for football season, not because I particularly like football, but because I like watching football with everybody.
And a few drinks and a couple appetizers are like $60, tops.
Oh, and the bartenders know your favorite drink and will just start making it when you walk in.
third places are dead
I’ve heard this line quite a few times. But… as far as I can tell, camping is still absolutely a popular past time. Parks and beaches are still a thing. Gyms and bars and clubs are as crowded as ever.
This reads much more like a meme than reality.
There are people who are off the deep end, yes, but the answer isn’t to attack them like this.
There’s a lot of mass media that’s screaming at people about how women and men are natural enemies and the only path to intimacy is through sexual assault.
Absolutely attack this ideology. Drag your friends back from it if you can. Mock and deride the notion if you can’t. Don’t tolerate the intolerable.
there really are huge societal problems that are resulting in people withdrawing, which is obviously bad for their mental health
Absolutely. So throw a party. Invite people out to do things. Mix and mingle.
Mocking and deriding people is very effective at radicalizing them, please do not do that, it consistently makes the problem worse.
I get that they would deserve that behaviour if they are advocating sexual assault, but if you care about that person, or the cultural issues they’re succumbing to, or the rising sentiment that men have to be rapey to ever have success with women, please don’t do that, it’s detrimental to the cause.
Mocking and deriding people is very effective at radicalizing them
To your side, certainly. That’s how hazing works. Exploiting people’s insecurities by calling them cucks and betas while presenting a facade of success and popularity is the Andrew Tate Special.
Piercing that bubble and outing fanatics as weirdos is necessary if you want to break their grip. If you’re tolerating abhorrent behavior - or, God forbid, rewarding it - you’re reinforcing it.
The key point here, however, is that exploiting insecurities through insults is not the only thing that Andrew Tate does.
He simultaneously messages to young men that they are weak/poor/unhealthy/cucks/betas/etc, but also that they deserve more, that it’s not entirely their fault that they’re not getting rich/women/success/etc, and that if they do xyz, they’ll fix themselves. Solely insulting them isn’t what makes the messaging effective, it’s the putting down of their current position in life while simultaneously promising a solution through notions of them having things like sex or money “taken” from them.
It’s certainly okay to mock or insult ideologies that are harmful, and to do a bit of that to the people that promote them, but only doing that will only radicalize them away from you. Think about these 2 scenarios:
Scenario A: “You’re worthless, you’ll never be anything, you’re poor, a virgin, and will die alone”
Scenario B: “You’re worthless, you’re poor, a virgin, and you’ll never be anything unless you follow these x steps to become a better man”
Scenario B is what Andrew Tate uses on young men. Scenario A is pure harassment that doesn’t motivate anybody on its own, Scenario B motivates action.
If you just ridicule a friend that has negative beliefs and don’t present any alternative, they will stop being your friend. If you deride them for sharing a harmful belief, then explain the alternative and how it would make them better off, you’re more likely to get them to actually change. (though this is, of course, not universal, and I’m sure a small subset of people could be motivated to change purely off insults and nothing more)
I hope I explained that well, I’m quite prone to rambling 😅
That sounds like an extremely good way to ensure they cling even tighter to the lies sold by the Tates of the world
Antagonism is extremely effective at shutting people off from change. If you antagonize someone and they actually change, they almost certainly could have been better reached through compassion.
And when, like the vast majority of people exposed to antagonism, they don’t? You have now convinced them anyone outside their bubble is unreasonable and cruel, and given them a sense of persecution they will reflexively hide behind any time they’re confronted with an outside perspective
That sounds like an extremely good way to ensure they cling even tighter to the lies sold by the Tates of the world
That’s because you’ve bought into the right wing propaganda. The endless campaign to coddle fascists has only ever produced more fascists.
Holy, this thread is a mess. If you think all men who struggle dating are fascists, this conversation ends here. If you accept the fact that not every man not in a relationship is a fascist, then we can talk. More specifically, we can talk about how the point isn’t to “coddle fascists”, but rather to not antagonize new men into the arms of Andrew Tate and others.
Is someone with social anxiety, therefore struggles dating, a fascist? You might know a far-right socially anxious guy, sure, but that doesn’t prove anything beyond the fact that this one person is a fascist. I’m not sure how it’s right wing propaganda to say that generalization is bad. But I’m also not sure whether you realize an issue (in this case, men struggle with relationships) can have more than one cause.
Word. I’m demisexual and greyromantic. The idea that any guy who isn’t dating or may have trouble dating is a fascist is inherently aphobic.
If you think all men who struggle dating are fascists
No idea where you got that. But I do see a lot of fascists who alienate women as friends and partners, then grow resentful when they don’t receive “respect” they feel they deserve.
This can quickly escalate into stalking and further violence against family or ex-partners, unless other people intervene.
The idea that a violent misogynist shouldn’t be argued with or deterred, because their sense of superiority is more important than anyone else’s safety is what’s brought us to the modern fascist moment.
Is someone with social anxiety, therefore struggles dating, a fascist?
If “social anxiety” means lashing out at women in order to force them to comply with your demands?
Absolutely.
Dead isn’t precise enough. Expensive is generally what they mean. Along with many free spaces being dead.
Having to spend money to socialize is a concern for many. Often times this is a lack of a car too. Or lack of public transportation. Sprawl, Stroads.
It’s a multi variate thing when people quip that third places are dead.
I…simply don’t know what to make of this. I’m a guy who finds himself thinking about the male loneliness epidemic a lot, and never in terms of finding a romantic/sexual partner. It’s always about solid platonic bonds outside of that and kin, and factors that make those harder to find and maintain these days.
Is this just a shitpost and I’m too stupid to get the joke?
You are thinking about the actual meaning of the male loneliness epidemic, whereas many people online are thinking about the buzzword loneliness epidemic which has been peddled in manospheres as “women hate men so we can’t get laid.”
You’re not stupid, you just can’t see the bottom of the hole from all the way up here.
Ahhh, k. Didn’t know (though not surprised) the term is being used in that context. Suppose that says something about what I’m exposing myself to these days, so that’s good to know.
Appreciate it!
It’s plain old misandry. They like to pretend this is the default, but look at the comments and it’s all men saying no it’s the first.
Funny. I always thought it was a camaraderie thing because I’m married. That definitely makes a lot of sense though because young men are becoming more right-wing and most women do not like that so it seems like that would be a big hurdle and maybe they just need to figure their shit out.
Semi related but it’s actually so irritating how I have to go through life where my value as a human being is decided by how much money I make, how many girls I get, how successful I am when I could not care less about any of that, but I will get judged severely for it if anyone “finds out” that I’m not successful in… things I don’t care about…
Like why is that my value to people? I don’t want to have kids with you, you don’t have to live my life, if it’s fun and rewarding being around me why is that not enough? It seeps in even to progressive speech where people will say “clearly he gets no women” like that decides their value as a person. Very cringe. Also don’t forget to downvote for minimizing male loneliness as men can’t get women for the 9999th time.
Sucks that men’s issues are being treated as a joke or mischaracterized as something else and not important.
I think a big issue is that third places have disappeared or not kept up with culture. All that’s near me are bars and Masonic Lodges, younger men are trying to drink less and don’t want to wear weird robes to hang out with other guys.
Are younger men trying to drink less, or do they just have less expendable income to go to bars and such?
both
Yup. The dangers are way more understood now. Between that and price, the wine industry is in tears right now. They have had worst sales YOY for last couple years than in recent history.
The entire alcohol industry is in decline because of younger drinkers, or lack thereof… Worst hit is Champagne, then wine. Expensive liqours and domestic beer have been hit pretty hard. Microbrewers are having the business trouble they always have, but most seem to be doing alright with the younger crowd with hard seltzer options.
and don’t want to where weird robes to hang out with other guys.
Meanwhile I met most of my friends through the SCA.
No judgement, just thought it was funny
Almost like this person is part of the problem.
I don’t think it’s just about sex. I’m not even sure incels think that. I think it’s more about relationships and someone to share your life with. I know some people seem fine with just friends and casual sex, but I think a lot of people have a need, or strong “want,” for a close, deep, intimate relationship. I know I do at least. Even if it was just about sex, sex is pretty much a human need.
Personally, I have severe life-long social anxiety (and depression), so it’s always been very hard for me to make friends or meet potential partners. I have worked on my anxiety issue (medication, attempts at self help, though I could never afford therapy), and I am better than before (I used to sometimes get panic attacks just being around large groups of people), but it’s still severe enough to hinder me in life in general (and noticeable to people around me).
It’s way more than a sex issue. Getting laid is easy, if you only care about getting your dick wet. Making and keeping friends, especially meaningful friendships, is getting harder and harder. Anyone who reduces it down to “lol who cares about incels not getting laid” is being bad faith dismissive about a massive problem.
This, it’s just propaganda to say it’s just about incels
Making and keeping friends, especially meaningful friendships, is getting harder and harder.
Have you seen the reaction these “male loneliness epidemic” guys have when a girl says they just want to be friends? Sorry, but there’s no way you’re trying to pass it off as “no it’s not about sex guys really they just want close friends and rainbows” with a straight face.
Has it ever occurred to you that bad actors could be hijacking something to use it for their own nefarious purposes? It happens all the time.
Bad actors? Hijacking? The hell are you talking about?
So… You know literally nothing about this topic at all and just want to lump it all together with incels, got it.
Still avoiding linking that source, huh? There are better ways to try and hide the fact you can’t find a good one.
source
go back to reddit
Ever heard of Ben Shapiro? Steven Chowder? Tim Pool? Charlie Kirk? They’re all insanely dishonest pieces of shit. They and other shitty fascist conservatives use the loneliness epidemic to try and say, “see? the liberals want you to be lonely! They hate trad wives and want women working!” etc etc etc, as if most women could magically decide to not work in this hellscape economy. As if it wasn’t mostly conservatives keeping wages low which removes the ability for single-income homes in the first place.
They’re all dishonest pieces of shits trying to divide the populace further. They offer no truths, only convenient lies to further rile people up.
Ever heard of Ben Shapiro? Steven Chowder? Tim Pool? Charlie Kirk? They’re all insanely dishonest pieces of shit.
Fully agree.
They and other shitty fascist conservatives use the loneliness epidemic
What loneliness epidemic?
They’re all dishonest pieces of shits trying to divide the populace further
Also fully agree.
What epidemic!? Are you seriously that fucking ignorant while trying to comment in this conversation? Why are you insisting on eating your own foot so hungrily?
Consider providing a source better than a random screenshot from a Tumblr post, then.
deleted by creator
They never said it wasn’t about sex. They want sex and…
Girls want sex and… too
Relationship stuff is just very hard. It’s like one of the few real things in this world.
Girls want sex and… too
Sure…? how does that fit in with incels and male loneliness epidemic exactly?
How doesn’t it? Unless male the loneliness epidemic is only an issue with gay men, but I thought it was for all men.
I said male loneliness epidemic is not about friends. Your counter is “women like sex too!” which yes… are you suggesting they should stop choosing who to have sex with and accept guys to fix this supposed epidemic? I assume not, for the sake of your own mental sanity.
In which case what’s even your point? Women like sex, the sky is blue, I ate rice today at lunch…?
What I am saying is that your comment here:
“no it’s not about sex guys really they just want close friends and rainbows”
Is not was not the person’s argument. They said:
It’s way more than a sex issue.
Which is what I was calling out in my original reply to you:
They never said it wasn’t about sex.
So your comment doesn’t address my original reply to the comment, nor your own quotes. Congrats.
I would say that getting laid is easy for most people if they have no standards (or very low standards). I have to be attracted to the person, too, or else it doesn’t work for me.
Making and keeping friends, especially meaningful friendships, is getting harder and harder.
Isn’t that kind of a self fabricated epidemic though? Seems like if it was just about struggling to make friends, and there’s a demographic of like minded people who are lonely, then isn’t the onus of befriending each other held by the demographic itself?
I feel like it’s a group of people who are bad at pingpong complaining to people about being bad at pingpong and expecting someone else to do something about it. Like, why not just play ping together until your better. An over simplified analogy of course, but my point is if what you say is true, I don’t really know what people are upset about.
Isn’t that kind of a self fabricated epidemic though?
Not necessarily. Societal factors play a huge role in how relationships with other people are formed. Places where people can naturally make deep lasting friendships are hard to come by right now. And just because two people are lonely does not mean they will make good friends. That would be wonderful if it was true, but there is more to building a friendship than just “I don’t have a friend and you don’t have a friend.”
Our society has a tendency to look at issues like this and say “well that just sounds like it’s all their own fault” without taking the thought further. WHY is this happening to so many people? And what can we do to better prepare young men to make lasting friendships and support each other more? The reason this has become more and more of an issue is specifically because people just put the blame on individuals, who don’t feel like they have the tools or opportunities to fix these issues. Then all it takes is for right wing propaganda to say “hey here is where the issue is, it’s because of feminism! You were right! It’s not your fault!” And because they are the only ones telling them that men are moving to the right in droves.
Not necessarily. Societal factors play a huge role in how relationships with other people are formed. Places where people can naturally make deep lasting friendships are hard to come by right now.
And being aware of those societal constraints also allows people to navigate around social norms. People are more interconnected than ever in the age of technology, most marriages now are initiated through the internet. If people can find a spouse online, I think you can manage to find a friend. How about you pm some of the boys who agree with you instead of wasting your time talking to me?
Our society has a tendency to look at issues like this and say “well that just sounds like it’s all their own fault” without taking the thought further.
Society cannot gift you friends…
WHY is this happening to so many people? And what can we do to better prepare young men to make lasting friendships and support each other more?
Being aware that there are problems… I suggest you discuss it with people who have the same beliefs. Maybe communication may be part of the problem.
The reason this has become more and more of an issue is specifically because people just put the blame on individuals, who don’t feel like they have the tools or opportunities to fix these issues.
What exactly do you think society can do to make you more sociable? Social studies can diagnose a problem at scale, but it’s not going to fix interpersonal relationship skills.
Then all it takes is for right wing propaganda to say “hey here is where the issue is, it’s because of feminism! You were right! It’s not your fault!” And because they are the only ones telling them that men are moving to the right in droves.
Breaking news… Fascist are willing to lie to naive young men! Crazy.
Society cannot gift you friends…
It sort of can! Think about a very-religious church group or a military squad. When people are forced to spend all their time with a small group, they mostly become friends.
In the not-very-distant past, we lived in much smaller communities with much more interdependence.
I think some of the “male loneliness” talk is because society used to literally gift men with a friend group and a family and now they need to get all these things on their own but a lot of boys have not been raised to develop the skills they need for this new society.
It sort of can! Think about a very-religious church group or a military squad. When people are forced to spend all their time with a small group, they mostly become friends.
I’d hardly say that a religious group or the military could be classified as a society, they’re just organizations within a society. No one is depriving these people from joining the same organizations today
the not-very-distant past, we lived in much smaller communities with much more interdependence.
Again, no one is stopping anyone from joining a commune or a village. And even within the organizations and social groups you mentioned there have always been social outcasts.
a lot of boys have not been raised to develop the skills they need for this new society.
I would say there is some truth to that, but at a certain amount of one recognizes that about themse there is a onus of personal responsibility required if you want to make changes.
I don’t mean to suggest that there’s nothing to be done or that having society provide you with community is the solution. Just that it used to be that way and we’re in a state of transition.
No one is depriving these people from joining the same organizations today
Right. But I’m saying that previously you were raised into an organization. You pretty much had no choice but to be a member of whatever group your family had been a member of. Now we’ve got a more free-form society and finding a group takes effort. And because you’re not being forced to stay in by societal expectations, it even takes effort to stay with the group.
Getting laid is easy
😵💫
Sure, in your 20s, if that. Pray tell, kind sir, what is your secret?
Treat people as human beings and respect their boundaries, take care of your health and appearance, then suddenly you’ll be drowning in pussy (or dick or both or neither whatever your preference)
Very funny. What’s the real way?
They forgot to mention that you have to leave your house.
And go to the third places that either you can’t afford or don’t exist anymore. This shit reads like my grandparents giving me job seeking advice. Just walk in, give em a firm handshake, and you’ll be married in a month lmao
My house? I can afford a house?
Cool i do all that but im still autisitc and have no charisma, do not get approached by anyone and dont approach others since i respect boundaries.
ASD can be a challenge, for sure. “dont approach others since i respect boundaries” is the thing you need to change: respecting boundaries doesn’t mean never talking to someone, it means allowing them to set boundaries.
A simple way to do this is, “hi I’m gmtom. Mind if I sit here?” Sitting next to someone is generally understood as an invitation to talk.
You could also try leaning into the ASD a little: “hi I’m gmtom and my special interest is arachnids. [smile, because you are making fun of yourself a little] Want to hear some neat facts about spiders?”
However you introduce yourself, the way you respect boundaries is that when they say, “no.” You reply, “OK,” and leave.
If you don’t feel confident about reading peoples’ body language, I would also try to check in every so often. Again, you can try owning the autism: “I’m autistic and can’t read your body language very well. Am I boring you or is this cool?” And again, respecting boundaries means you accept it if they say “I don’t want to talk anymore.”
You will not succeed every time. Meeting people and making friends is a lot of work and takes practice (like: how much talking vs listening should you do? There’s no one correct answer, unfortunately). Charismatic people got a head start from their brain-types during childhood, but they are charismatic because they keep meeting and talking with new people to exercise their skills.
Just chiming into say from a platonic bonding perspective, I’d totally be down for someone to approach me with spider facts in tow.
Speaking for myself, getting laid is orders of magnitude more difficult than making friends.
Tip: getting laid, clothes OFF
making friends, clothes ONLol somehow that strikes me as a poor flirting technique
I didn’t live in the 50s or before the 50s, but I think anything past the television time means shitty, non meaningful, relationships.
Male loneliness is about camaraderie. If it was about getting laid, then prostitution would solve it. Busting a nut isn’t gonna fix a psychological problem facing the adult male population in modern western society and this shitty tumblr post isn’t gonna either. Its down right perpetuating it. Now, some truth is there; COMPANIONSHIP (not not getting laid) is a wonderful thing and does help, but the root of the problem is societal.
While I agree sex on its own is not enough, I partially disagree that its not important. I do legitimately think a lot of this anxiety among currently non-sex having men would be significantly reduced if prostitution was commonly available, legal, not stigmatized (for either party), and safe.
As it stands it is none of those things, at least in most places.
i frankly disagree. a lot of the value i think men derive from sex is actually being chosen by a woman to have said sex with them. putting your dick in a woman and busting a nut will only leave you feel emptier i think. (then again, no experience so this is my 2 cents)
That is part of it for people who desperately need external validation, but if it was the only element no one would bother with prostitutes, VR porn, and sex dolls at all. Heck, if that was enough more men probably would be content to just be “friend zoned” because friendship is very validating.
In reality though its existential and experiential. Its men wanting to experience something extremely pleasurable and contentment bringing (and consistently) before they take their final dirtnap. Its fear of missing out on a major life experience of being in a sexual relationship for key parts of their lives (20’s and 30’s). Every day they’re single they experience the fear of their youthful years slipping away and missing out on some of the most fulfilling and fun activities a human can participate in.
Thanks for sharing your perspective. I’ll think about it more for sure, but I still very much wonder if there is more to it. Vr porn and dolls and ai girlfriends and the rest of it, i feel, rarely leave the users fulfilled so i wonder if there might be a hierarchy of needs here. But i dont disagree that there is certainly a special place for intimacy around the 20s and 30s where this is especially important
Another way to put it is that our culture is creating a lot of men who no one wants to be around. Who either don’t see themselves as needing to be likable or who see being likable as something that goes completely against their identity – something that is ‘impossible’ for them that they refuse to work on.
A lot of this may be tied to ideas of masculinity that see social awareness, empathy and cooperation as feminine traits since ‘tough guys’ in media can get ‘respect’ and attention despite eschewing all of those traits.
If you feel particularly lacking in those traits, it can feel very reassuring to tell yourself you can’t work on those things and it’s unfair to be judged or suffer consequences for deficiencies in them - because there is no escaping the sense of vulnerability one feels when trying to build up something one is weak in.
So we end up with a lot of guys who are sullen about being miserable and being miserable to be around.
These guys have a lot of hard work ahead of them. The first big hurdle is accepting that they have to be responsible for becoming people that others like being around - and getting over their safety blanket idea that they ‘can’t’ so they shouldn’t bother.
Idk about other but for me, perosnally its about a romantic relationship.
I started trying to solve my lonliness like 8 years ago now, i followed the advice, i worked on myself as a person, my hegiene my appearance, bot my mental and physical health, i picked up some hobbies, got out of my shell, made some great freinds that i love and love me… but still no romantic partner. Im happy with myself but say when I travel no matter how much i enjoy it theres always that thought in the back of my mind that i dont have anyone to enjoy it with, im not going to have anyone to look back at these times fondly with and it really gets me and puts a sour mood on oretty much anything i do and it feels like my time to find someone is quickly running out.
