My wife and I have life plans that make HRT unrealistic in the near future. We’re mostly concerned with fertility and my wife is still coming to terms with my identity. She understands it - she’s just grappling with the possible future changes.

In the meantime, I’m starting to do what I can to transition without HRT. Shaving. Exercise and dieting. Growing my hair out. Facial routines and hair routines. Etc.

I found FaceApp (like many other trans folks) and I’ve become a little obsessive. I take at least one photo a day and I’ve experimented with using the generated photos in private accounts for a euphoria hit. But I’m feeling like it’s making me constantly obsess with transitioning. I’m perusing trans timelines, MTF fashion, etc. on my phone a lot more than usual. Before using the app, I didn’t really have “goals”. I just wanted to get as close to feminine as possible. Now, I see this other face and I want to be her. I feel trapped in this body.

Anyways, I guess I’m just venting here. It hurts to feel this way.

  • recursive_recursionEnglish
    16·
    4 days ago

    What you’re experiencing sounds similar to:

    Personally I don’t use beautify/face-gen apps as I had a terrible experience on Insta and Facebook where I was glued to my feeds because I was depressed about my current state of life.

    While I can’t say for certain what’s the best for you, what I can suggest however is to talk about about how you feel with your wife and perhaps with your close friends and anyone else you can trust as it seems like you want more encouragement to be able to perservere as you transition.

    Either way from me to you:
    YOU GOT THIS!✊✊

    Even though you currently don’t look as how you wish at the moment, you’ve got a great wife whose one of your greatest supports and you’ve got a great starting plan for getting there!🌻🍀✨

    • Captain JanewayOPEnglish
      9·
      4 days ago

      That’s a good point. I have therapy on Friday and I’ve been bottling up a lot of those feelings for that. But I’m going to bring it up to my wife. We’ve sort of bridged the emotional gap to the point that I think she’s comfortable affirming me without feeling concerned about the whole thing.

      • recursive_recursionEnglish
        6·
        4 days ago

        But I’m going to bring it up to my wife. We’ve sort of bridged the emotional gap to the point that I think she’s comfortable affirming me without feeling concerned about the whole thing.

        Totally fair🤗🌻