My wife and I have life plans that make HRT unrealistic in the near future. We’re mostly concerned with fertility and my wife is still coming to terms with my identity. She understands it - she’s just grappling with the possible future changes.
In the meantime, I’m starting to do what I can to transition without HRT. Shaving. Exercise and dieting. Growing my hair out. Facial routines and hair routines. Etc.
I found FaceApp (like many other trans folks) and I’ve become a little obsessive. I take at least one photo a day and I’ve experimented with using the generated photos in private accounts for a euphoria hit. But I’m feeling like it’s making me constantly obsess with transitioning. I’m perusing trans timelines, MTF fashion, etc. on my phone a lot more than usual. Before using the app, I didn’t really have “goals”. I just wanted to get as close to feminine as possible. Now, I see this other face and I want to be her. I feel trapped in this body.
Anyways, I guess I’m just venting here. It hurts to feel this way.
When i started HRT my doc asked If i wanted to freeze sperm incase i wanted to have children one day, maybe thats an Option?
Btw: Love your Username ❤️
Kathryn Janeway would go heft a phaser compression rifle, shoot down the FaceApp intruder, then go see her friendly neighborhood EMH about a hypospray full of estrogen. And maybe consider freezing materials for IVF later on.
Seriously though, those things lead you down the path of unrealistic expectations. Enjoy the journey to your own femininity. It’s different for all of us, and no less valid because some awful “AI” code doesn’t match up to the face you end up with.
Lol yes, she would. I am considering freezing materials for IVF for sure!
You need to stay away from those apps. They create unrealistic versions of ourselves that we aspire to, but can never truly be. It’s hard when you are first starting to explore your femininity—you want all of the changes to happen right now. But these things take time. It’s been years for me now, and I still am trying to accept myself for who I am. Stay strong, you can do this, but be patient.
Yeah, we agree, as entities who used it in the past and are far into our bodily transition with HRT the body doesn’t look anything like it.
I’m not really worried about my body too much. I’m not super dysphoric about the shape (though I want my belly fat to go away). But I do really want the effeminate look in the face and hair. Are those apps still unrealistic? It’s hard to imagine I’ll never get to that goal point.
It will obviously vary, but I’ve been on HRT for a little over a year and started it late-ish (in my early 30s). I personally can say my face has femminized a fair amount - obviously my bone structure hasn’t changed, but my eyes are slightly wider and softer, cheeks a bit fuller with fat sitting in a different place, skin GLOWS. There’s obviously features that I would love to see change more/at all, but I’m much happier looking at myself in the mirror and in photos 🩷 I’ve also been getting laser hair removal for my facial hair along with other parts of my body. My friends and people I see occasionally for errands often have incredibly kind things to say about the changes they’ve been seeing over the year.
I did try one of those apps a few times and things didn’t necessarily click for me since they kind of added makeup over my face. I personally want to be happy with my face without makeup, so I didn’t feel they were showing a version of myself I wanted to see.
Yes, we were including face in body, apologies. Hair can improve, however from our understanding it requires HRT for seven years to fully recover from the effects of T. Our face hasn’t changed much we think, sadly, unlike a lot of trans femmes but our hair being longer helps there.
Yes, we think we are an odd case as most trans femmes we have seen we think look more femme than us/the body. However, we haven’t exactly kept pictures over time as we both do not think to, and always found pictures of the body displeasing except for when we were really trying to look good. That is changing somewhat but most of the time we don’t like it, or just don’t recognise it.
Despite all of the warnings here, I’m now super tempted to check this FaceApp thing out myself…
Edit: Oh. It’s one of these apps that has 90% of the features locked behind a ‘pro’ badge. And is subscription based, not a once off payment. No thanks.
I’ve played with the app a bit. The gender setting does a lot of subtle stuff like changing your face shape ever-so-slightly. I think it’s kind of worth trying both directions, just to see how it will try and make you more conventionally attractive. Masc me was very rugged and had a very good beard, and femme me had bigger eyes, smoother skin, and pinker lips. It’s uncanny and freaky, but it gave me a better perspective on what the app is actually doing. The positive side is that it’s helped me think about how to do hair, makeup, and eyebrows.
That’s a good tip about checking it out both ways just to keep your sense of perspective and reality. What I’m hearing is that it has its uses and could be fun, as long as you keep your wits about you and don’t fall too much in love with what you see and end up with unrealistic expectations.
What you’re experiencing sounds similar to:
Personally I don’t use beautify/face-gen apps as I had a terrible experience on Insta and Facebook where I was glued to my feeds because I was depressed about my current state of life.
While I can’t say for certain what’s the best for you, what I can suggest however is to talk about about how you feel with your wife and perhaps with your close friends and anyone else you can trust as it seems like you want more encouragement to be able to perservere as you transition.
Either way from me to you:
YOU GOT THIS!✊✊Even though you currently don’t look as how you wish at the moment, you’ve got a great wife whose one of your greatest supports and you’ve got a great starting plan for getting there!🌻🍀✨
That’s a good point. I have therapy on Friday and I’ve been bottling up a lot of those feelings for that. But I’m going to bring it up to my wife. We’ve sort of bridged the emotional gap to the point that I think she’s comfortable affirming me without feeling concerned about the whole thing.
But I’m going to bring it up to my wife. We’ve sort of bridged the emotional gap to the point that I think she’s comfortable affirming me without feeling concerned about the whole thing.
Totally fair🤗🌻
