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this meme has some truth in it, in that these six vegetables are all brassica oleracea. but, the factoid in the center of the meme is misleading: brassica oleracea can be many things but (despite brassicaceae being “the mustard and cabbage family”) brassica oleracea is not typically called “wild mustard plant”.
edit: toned down my refutation; i guess maybe it is sometimes 👀 but i think not really
Tagged & linked comment. :)
Always a relevant xkcd, isn’t there
To all the veggie haters:
Broccoli recipe:
- Fry broccoli with paprika and small pieces of meat or tofu in a pan until brown.
- Add water and seasonings.
- Steam to desired hardness.
- Serve with rice or couscous.
Cauliflower recipe:
- Make brown butter by heating up butter and adding breadcrumbs to soak it up.
- Serve it on enough steamed cauliflower to justify the amount of brown butter you are about to eat.
Sprouts do well with Braising, this is roughly how I do them, based on a whim that turned out fantastic.
- Halve and clean your sprouts, salt and pepper them
- Sear cut side down in oil of your choice. Bacon is the classic but absolutely not required if you want to do it vegan, maybe use some smoked paprika to get the smokey flavour, add aromatics like garlic near the end, it burns easy.
- Deglaze with balsamic vinegar, add enough liquid to just barely cover the bottom of the pan, cover and simmer until happy.
I know sprouts are far less bitter than they were when I was a kid, but I legit thought I disliked them. Borrowed a lot from braised cabbage recipes, just with a bit more aggressive browning. The sprouts hold up really well to longer cooking IMO (can’t say the same to leeks, braised leeks are great, but not how I did them, turned into a textural nightmare), they’re amazing hot or cold.
Or, the Italian way: simmer garlic in a pan with olive oil, throw in the vegetables and a bit of water, throw in some salt, cover, cook until soft, check occasionally that it isn’t burning
My recent favourite is broccoli roasted until crispy, so good. Before then it was crispy kale but as we all know it’s basically the same plant
Here is a good one, Mashed cauliflower:
- Boil cauliflower
- submerge mixer with some milk
- enjoy the smoothest mash you have ever tried that comes out to like 40 calories per 100g
Roasted anything (brussel spouts, broccoli, cauliflower, green beans, asparagus)
- Coat in olive oil, salt, garlic powder
- air fry or roast
Enjoy awesome tasting veggies.
Veggie rice(white rice is for sushi goddamnit)
- Satuee some onions, garlic
- add some cut up bell peppers, tomatoes
- cook for a while
- add frozen peas and carrots and a choice of frozen vegetables (broccoli or green beans)
- add water and bring to a boil
- add the rice and simmer it for the prescribed time +1-2 minutes
- let it sit for 10 minutes
Enjoy a rice full of veggies and color ( I also use a “curry” mix that’s turmeric, koriander and a bunch of other stuff that gives it a nice yellow color, and this way you have your rice and veggies in one and they enhance each other’s flavor.
Animals turn into crab, plant turn outfrom cabbage
Wait… it’s all mustard?
Always has been.
How? Like… literally how?
I grow kale and it looks nothing like the plant in the OP. It looks like a regular bunch of kale.
Or is this like “all 6 vegetables come from one main vegetable”, kind of like how all citrus fruits comes from citron.
kind of like how all citrus fruits comes from citron.
This is what happened
No, it’s cooler than that! All these vegetables are cultivars of the same species (Brassica oleracea). Citrus trees are different species with common origins.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brassica_oleracea https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Citrus
Citron broke my brain. If you’re telling me this is mustard and only mustard, my brain might just die in confusion.
Just like dog breeds look very distinct, but cranked up to eleven with horrible deformities. Imagine if we continued to breed chihuahuas to have bigger heads and smaller bodies until they are 90% head. Or breed a breed of hound to be smaller with increasingly bigger ears until it’s 90% ears. They would still be dogs of the same species because they can procreate together.
Artificial selection!
If you think that’s amazing - look up what bananas looked like before human cultivation. Basically any fruit or vegetable you eat is the product of centuries of humans carefully selecting what seeds to save and plant.
My wife and I had fried plantains at a Venezuelan restaurant a couple weeks ago. That shit was absolutely divine with beans, rice, meat, and a fried egg on top.
Its exactly like that.
cabbage, to be more accurate
🔫🌼 Always has been.
Damn these healthy GMOs!
And every one fucking delicious
People have some hate boner against Brussels sprouts, but damn - if you know how to prepare them, they’re delicious.
Look, anything pan fried with butter, salt, black pepper, bacon and a little white wine is going to taste great…
I literally just take them out of the freezer, drizzle a little bit of olive oil (1-3grams), salt, garlic powder and air fry them for 23 minutes at 200 C.
That’s it.
Same recipe works with green beans, asparagus, broccoli
I just bake them with a little oilve oil, salt and rosemary. That’s all it takes. If I have the time I boil them for 5 minutes before cutting them in half and baking them.
Selective breeding does play a role but also how you prepare them. Just like other brassicae if you cook them for too long they start smelling bad, so you want to use high heat and relatively short cooking times.
For example. My go-to approach is to cut them into halves and pan-fry in lard. High fire. People claim it’s delicious.
the don’t smell bad… they just smell like cabbage when cooked longer
I mean, things fried in lard do usually come out delicious.
Right, when I was growing up, always steamed or boiled - absolute trash. Just throw them on a pan under the broiler with some oil and salt/pepper chefs kiss
I actually prefer to eat them raw. A cup a day before sleeping. They act as sleeping pills for me
You get used to the taste and learn to enjoy it, same as with beer except they are good for you and increase hair density. It’s a real life equivalent of ent water
I’ve had this discussion before, had the “proper way” of preparing them explained to me and made them according to these instructions. Turns out, I just don’t like the taste. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Individual tastes are a thing, too. At least someone out there is bound to dislike even the most beloved dishes; the thing, for me, is how many people claim to hate Brussels sprouts, even if they deserve some leafy and greasy love.
Wait, but I put mustard on my broccoli…
Yo dawg, I heard you like mustard…
Mustard the condiments is from the seeds of different species. There are two types, oriental Brassica juncea and white mustard _Sinapsis alba _ that can be used.
Brassica juncea has been cultivated for a long time. With lots of different cultivars.
This is news to me, but I was always kind of onto cauliflower just being albino broccoli, so not too surprised there.
We eat like 2 plants. One is brassica mentioned above.
The other one is nightshade. In the nightshade family we find tomatos, aubergine, tobacco, peppers, physalis, potatoes and of course the extremely toxic bella-donna (deadly nightshade)
We also eat like two animals, sea insects and variants of dog
Just a small correction: you missed an “a” in bella-donna (bella donna means “beautiful woman” in Italian)
I very much did!
Doesn’t sound like a complete diet
“like” is doing a lot of heavy lifting there
to make the list a bit more complete there’s also the rose plants (rosebuds, apples, plums, basically all the nice sweet fruits growing on trees and bushes), legumes, and of course grasses (basically all the grains are some form of grass seeds)
Does this mean I can put mustard on things instead of eating all these vegetables?
See, I like vegetables!
scientific name
uppercase species
not even underlined or italicized
ancient and medieval europeans went through some shit
Weird how mustard (the condiment) tastes so good yet the cultivars of this particular species all taste horrible to me.
Made from a completely different species.
Sinapsis alba regular mustard.
Brassica juncea spicy mustard
While they are separate species, they are part of the same family (including Sinapsis alba, despite the name).
i mean mustard (the condiment) is basically just a flavourful sugary starch paste, anything tastes good with 15 grams of sugar.
It’s also a completely different part of the plant, it’s like going “man i like apples but the seeds taste horrible! how odd”The mustard you’re eating seems to be quite different from mine. Mine has a whopping 2.6 grams of carbohydrates per 100g, some of the brassica vegetables probably have more than that.
uhhh, condiment mustard is made of mustard seed, not sure how you imagined it working otherwise?
and seeds are kinda by definition starchy, they need starch to store energy for the plant to sprout through the soil.
Actually, the mustard in my fridge contains more fat and protein than starch or sugar. And that’s actually very common for seeds, many of them contain more than 50% fat.
And y’know, the essential oils kind of dominate the taste. It’s not peanut butter FFS.
lol and I think they all taste bad.
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mustard on the beat, yo
kale caul kohl kål
Even the etymological family is a mess. They all backtrack to Latin caulis stalk, stem, cabbage stem; but even in closely related language varieties they might mean different plant varieties, like
- Galician, general - col wild kale/cabbage/whatever, collards
- Galician, south - couva~couve kale
- Portuguese - couve kale
- Spanish - col cabbage
…and of course people had to reborrow the word from Latin to refer to stems in general, to make the thing even messier. (e.g. PT “caule” stem)
Yeah, it’s wild how many times that root has been reborrowed for different vegetable names
Yeah, it’s wild how many times that root has been reborrowed for different vegetable names
The root is the same, but the stems and leaves are all different!
![[Half True; see linked comment] BRASSICAS](https://mander.xyz/pictrs/image/e633e226-f664-4b9a-bc23-1fa794d50583.jpeg){kind=link}