• Sanctus@lemmy.world
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    1. I’m sorry, but due to cultural norms the name Twitter is rooted deep within our modern language.

    2. [PERSUASION] Maybe a free little blue check will do the trick

    3. Or what?

    4. [INTIMIDATION] drop your daughter’s dead name and I’ll drop your site’s.

      • pivot_root@lemmy.world
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        Narrator: You imagine throwing a burlap sack over his head. His underlings would be extremely displeased with you, but he wouldn’t put up much of a fight himself.

        Narrator: You can think of someone who would be extremely pleased with your offering, however.

        Elon: You’re looking at me funny. Is there something you need?

        1. [THE DARK URGE] Give in to your desires.

        2. [PERSUASION] I have an investment opportunity that I think you would be interested in.

        3. Can I see your wares?

        4. No, nothing. I was just lost in thought.

        • Chailles@lemmy.world
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          You know you’ve played the game too much when you can hear how the Narrator would read those lines.

          • pivot_root@lemmy.world
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            And you know you’ve also watched too much Thunderf00t when you can hear how Elon would read his line too…

      • harmonea@kbin.social
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        I started a DU playthrough and laughed almost as hard as I alt-F4ed the first time I picked one of those fantasize options and saw what happened. 10/10 addition to the dialogue tree

      • grue@lemmy.world
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        What game has “THE DARK URGE” dialogue options? I was imagining Fallout before, but this makes me think it must be some newer one.

      • EdibleFriend@lemmy.world
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        I mean…im already a masochist when i fuck so…I…I really don’t know how we got here to be perfectly honest.

      • GreenMario@lemm.ee
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        If I win the Powerball I’ll be able to afford a good Dom.

        Now the real paradox: if I can only cum when billionaires can’t get their way but I’m a billionaire and my mistress denies me orgasm, what happens? Does the universe implode on itself?

      • assassin_aragorn@lemmy.world
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        Nah just donate to charity until you’re well below a billion. Even a hundred million sets me up for life, and it has the added bonus of not being so much that my descendants end up as fucking idiots like Musk.

  • Plap plap 𓁑𓂸 @lemmyf.uk
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    The problem is, is that if you engage with anyone outside of the internet, they have no fucking idea what you’re talking about when you call it “X”.

    It’s so fucking stupid of a name. Even worse than Facebook changing to Meta.

    You can ask people to call it “X” all day, every day, but you can’t just change the name of your brand/product to a single letter, that people use every day for other things, and expect it to work out for you.

    • homura1650@lemmy.world
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      Facebook the product is still Facebook. The only name that changed was that of the company that owns Facebook, which makes sense as that holding company also runs other products like Instagram.

      Google made a similar move in 2015 when it created Alphabet to hold the non Google parts of Google.

      In both cases the renaming was on the coorporate side. They made no effort to loose the old trademark, and continue to operate under it today.

      The only high profile case that comes to mind that is simmilar to Twitter is when Comcast rebranded itself as Xfinity in 2010. In that case, it worked because: A) Comcasts reputation was way worse than Twitters and B) people don’t have that much of an option anyway. In the otherhand, the rebranding failed in the sense that everyone still knows them as Comcast.

      • Pinklink@lemm.ee
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        I honestly thought Comcast just bought xfinity at some point. Also fuck xfinity

        • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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          I think they DID buy xfinity, then used the name because they were done wiping their ass with “comcast”. I only say this because I distinctly remember having both xfinity and comcast showing up as internet options on some old house listings.

          • vivadanang@lemm.ee
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            xfinity wasn’t an acquisition, it was just comcast rebranding trying to separate itself from the stank of comcast. It did occur during a time of acquisitions of other cable networks, but that’s been true of comcast for 15ish years. both domains still work for customers.

            • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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              Ahhh, so it could’ve been a local acquisition changing their names on ads before Comcast finished the job, or maybe vice-versa somehow. Interesting.

      • mgiuca@lemmy.world
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        Largely true but as a small aside, Google is still a company (within Alphabet). Alphabet is purely a corporate structure, and all branding still has Google on it. Whereas Facebook is now only a product, Meta is the company brand with its own logo and products named directly after it (like Meta Quest).

    • visak@lemmy.world
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      In defense of Zuckerberg – and there’s something I never thought I’d say – they changed the name of the company so that they could introduce new brands. They were not dumb enough to rebrand the successful products. It’s just now Facebook by Meta.

    • victron@programming.dev
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      That was totally his idea, the idea of a fucking imbecile, I bet he fired the entire PR and marketing departments, because he thinks he knows better.

  • thechadwick@lemmy.world
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    I’m so tired of these woke CEOs and their snowflake whining over misgendering their companies. There’s the name that a company is assigned at birth, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to change the way I’ve always called them (for my whole life and ALL of god-fearing Christian history) because some liberal snowflake CEO one-day wakes up and simply declares, “twitter is now X” ffs.

    The facts of the birth incorporation certificate, DON’T CARE ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS little pissant mUsK… GET OVER IT!

    /s since satire is dead.

    • Queen HawlSera@lemm.ee
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      Mr. Pibb, Dr. Robotnik, Sierra Mist, I’m not using your woke “Pibb Extra, Dr. Eggman, Starry” nonsense!

      • Nepenthe@kbin.social
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        Oh, that’s what that was about? I honestly just assumed Starry was some crap knock-off that the restaurant just happened to have that day. Not really sure what the motive would be or why they’d expect the reaction to rebranding a nearly 20yr old product would be any other assumption. I’m going to disagree with them. They should be glad I’m not calling them Sprite.

        • Queen HawlSera@lemm.ee
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          Yeah… I thought the same, that it was some knock-off company’s bootleg Sprite, wasn’t a very good idea, especially since the product packaging looks like Sprite’s

    • Yendor@reddthat.com
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      “The Chaser” is a satire site. You’re getting really angry over something that never happened.

  • Transcriptionist@lemmy.world
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    Image Transcription:

    X post by user The Chaser @chaser reading: ‘Stop calling it Twitter’ says guy who deadnames his own child. Underneath is a photo of Elon Musk’s face with a barely visible Tesla logo in the background and the link to the article at chaser.com.au

    [I am a human, if I’ve made a mistake please let me know. Please consider providing alt-text for ease of use. Thank you. 💜]

      • Apathy Tree@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        That’s going to happen anyway when he enables The Code, he just has to wait for enough people to buy them to save the climate he’s actively helping destroy with rockets, then he gets all them tree hugger no good hippies in one go!

        /foil hat

    • LEDZeppelin@lemmy.world
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      And if you say Twitter 69 times inside of a Tesla models S3XY at sharp 4:20am, Elon Musk will cum inside the car

  • Aganim@lemmy.world
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    No. I’m exercising my Musk-given right of ultimate free speech and will continue calling it Twitter, just because I feel like it. Musk would be proud of me standing up against censorship. Oh wait…

  • Margot Robbie@lemmy.world
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    … And all of this could have been avoided if he just renamed it “Twitter by X”, so make Twitter part of the X super-app that he wanted to build.

  • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldM
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    Yep. One of many reasons I’m not catering to the whims of a billionaire and calling it what he wants it to be called. It’s going to continue to be Twitter as far as I’m concerned.

  • lowleveldata@programming.dev
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    I could call it that but then nobody would know what the fuck I’m talking about. Maybe at least pick a name that’s unique?