• drail@fedia.io
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    4 months ago

    I have both ADHD and minor hearing loss that started when I was a teenager (wear earplugs if you frequent concerts and play in live bands, turn the music down on your headphones from max volume). It is a rough combo that led to plenty of awkward situations as an awkward teen.

    The worst was when I was on a first date at a SixFlags and my date didn’t tell me she was terrified of rollercoasters. I felt bad, but only went on a few rides without her and spent the remaining time trying to win a stuffy at a carnival game for her, trying to have a good time anyway. She was really really quiet and I was having a hard time with all the stimulus and crowd noise understanding her. Eventually, it got to the point where I was asking her to repeat everything more than once, so I started to autopilot. While we were waiting in line for something, she muttered something and I responded, my brain playing fill in the blanks, “Uh-huh.”

    Turns out, when I heard her say “Mumble mumble ride mumble bring mumble with you mumble.” she was not saying, “I really wish I could go on a ride, but I am happy you wanted to bring me with you anyway!”

    She was, instead, saying something along the lines of, “It must be so annoying that I haven’t gone on a single ride, I bet you regret bringing me here with you at all today.”

    Needless to say, there was no 2nd date. She told me later it was shitty of me to respond like that, and I couldn’t convince her that I just misheard her. Since then, if I can’t understand someone after two tries, I just explain that I have bad hearing and need them to speak up. Asking someone to repeat themselves will always be less awkward than driving her home after that.

    • TexasDrunk@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      Not much to add except I have the exact same issue. Once in a while I can piece together what someone is saying but I just prefer to say I’ve been to too many concerts and can’t hear for shit.

  • BruceTwarzen@lemm.ee
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    4 months ago

    When i was a kid in school, i assumed everyone played that game where the teacher explained something and you would just look at him and see how long you can just not pay attention. Man was i good at this game only i played.

  • Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee
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    4 months ago

    I just keep pressing buttons, most it not all irl conversions can be fully skipped this way.

    It’s mostly bullshit anyway.

  • Xanthrax@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    I always focus too much on what they’re saying and the potential/ hypothetical situations they could encounter in the future. Like they’ll be trying to make one specific point, but with ADD, I’ll be overcomplicating everything. In the end, I’ll get emotionally overwhelmed and start focusing on something else. Meanwhile, the other person is wondering wtf just happened to our conversation.

    • BallsandBayonets@lemmings.world
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      4 months ago

      If it’s an important phone call I usually ask the other person to email me with all the details we talked about. I usually make up some excuse about being out running errands so I can’t take notes but it’s 95% that their phone call woke me up and 100% that I don’t ever remember anything said in a phone call.

      • Zorsith
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        4 months ago

        I will say or agree to literally anything if it ends a phone call as soon as possible.

    • mouserat@discuss.tchncs.de
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      4 months ago

      It’s my most critical skill to adapt the tone of my “mhmhmmm” to the tone of the word salad spoken by the other side