https://hexbear.net/post/2226865

You can find further details on how the survey was conducted here (yes I was drunk the whole time). 158 people responded yes or maybe. Noticed the survey here recently and wanted to share.

  • cowboycrustation [he/him]
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    9 months ago

    Y’all. This is not the place to have hexbear vs blahaj round three and make personal insults. Your comment will be removed if you do this. If you violate this repeatedly you will get a temporary ban.

    • good_girl
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      9 months ago

      she’s a trans user posting trans content in the trans subcommunity on the gender diverse instance.

      • Neato@ttrpg.network
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        9 months ago

        Citing herself on a different account that gets widely blocked. Which, if I’m reading this right, is an instance blocked here.

        Is that not against the rules? Defederation evading?

        • AdaA
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          9 months ago

          No, it’s not against the rules. Hexbear is defederated because their users had a tendency to disrupt external instances en-masse. This is not that.

        • good_girl
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          9 months ago

          people are allowed to be on multiple instances lmao.

        • First Majestic Comet
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          9 months ago

          Defederation evading?

          That’s not a thing, people are allowed to be on multiple instances, if they weren’t that would go against the free and open nature of the Fediverse don’t you think?

          • AdaA
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            9 months ago

            I’ll give you the elevator pitch version, because it was a whole thing. In short, Blahaj was one of the first instances that hexbear federated with when they enabled federation. But then they encountered the 196 community, which is very anti hexbear/tankies. A huge fight erupted, with dogpiles and harassment. We talked about defederating hexbear, but they defederated from us before we could.

            • cowboycrustation [he/him]M
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              9 months ago

              Dang…I did see a lot of tankie shit in the meta thread. That’s too bad it happened like that. Always makes me sad when there’s infighting among trans people.

              • kristina (she/her)OP
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                9 months ago

                as a mod of c/traa on hexbear, yeah if it were me id love to just to link all the trans comms together. having them all split just increases workload and burnout on trans mods of all instances dealing with transphobia and spreads out the trans community too much. this is why we have 23 mods on c/traa, to spread out the annoyance and remove bad content before any vulnerable people see it. we usually remove bad stuff within 5 minutes, no matter the timezone. its also more democratic, less cliquey, and we regularly ask people to mod with no requirement other than being trans/adjacent. in fact, if you asked to mod on c/traa id add you in a heartbeat

                there were also some significant issues with dm harassment from 196 users towards trans women, and we’re extremely overprotective of our vulnerable users so we’re much more likely to pull the plug on federation than other instances if even a few infractions have happened without people being banned/posts removed from that instance.

                if it was possible to federate with only the trans communities here, i feel like everyone would agree with it.

                • cowboycrustation [he/him]M
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                  9 months ago

                  That sucks that happened with 196. I blocked it pretty much the day I got Lemmy because I found the content annoying. It seems so out of place on this instance. My experience on here has been good so far.

                  I agree with you that most people would want to unite if it were only the trans communities on here. The more people, the more support and resources.

          • Catoblepas
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            9 months ago

            At risk of starting it back up again by oversimplifying, there was a contingent of Hexbear users starting shit over here and claiming blahaj was transphobic because they didn’t believe the admins responded to reports fast enough (ie, while they were asleep in Australia). When the admins polled the blahaj user base on whether or not we wanted to defederate and it became obvious that the majority of users wanted to defederate, Hexbear decided to declare that to “protect their users from transphobia” they would take their ball and leave first defederate from blahaj. Part of this was trying to convince everyone on their way out the door that all the trans users should migrate to Hexbear, because they’re soooo much less transphobic 🙄

            It left a really nasty taste in my mouth and I trust very little about anyone that comes here talking positively about Hexbear given how absolutely shit flinging the whole thing was. If you want to view it in more detail the relevant threads are in !main@lemmy.blahaj.zone if you go back far enough.

            • cowboycrustation [he/him]M
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              9 months ago

              Ughhhh I hate trans infighting. Why’d they have to be asses.

              And geez, that’s the dumbest complaint. The blahaj admins clearly try hard to do their jobs. What did they expect them to do, never sleep? Entitled behavior. If they want things done faster, they should have offered to help or find help.

              • kristina (she/her)OP
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                9 months ago

                At the risk of an argument, I don’t think its entitled to want an extremely secure place that catches transphobia almost instantly. Trans people imo deserve a place that is theirs. A lot of people in the trans community are very suicidal and deal with a lot of pain and isolation IRL, having a community to go to where they don’t have to interact with transphobic bullshit, concern trolling, etc. is a good way to make these people feel more connected and find ways to build support (cheers intro begins playing). There’s a lot of ways to make sure this happens, for instance, good mod tools, bots catching bad behavior, an aggressively supportive userbase, and massive mod teams.

                Also, Hexbear isn’t just an instance, we regularly do mutual aid. I’ve personally helped 3 homeless trans people get housing via hexbear. And of course I really hope blahaj can do similar too. Its always great to have a backup if something implodes, and its even better if its not a corporate controlled community.

                • cowboycrustation [he/him]M
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                  9 months ago

                  Entitled wasn’t the right word for me to use. I meant moreso that it’s not wholly realistic. I agree with you that trans people deserve a place to not see that stuff, but I’ve had times where I’ve removed comments the second it was posted and two days later I’d still be getting reports because of third party readers with slower refresh rates.

                  Everybody’s working hard to get this place modded more efficiently. This community is only about two months old so we’re still trying to figure things out. Most of the stuff that I’ve had to remove on here requires more investigation than your typical auto mod can catch, although we do have an auto blacklist flagging system. I do want to ensure that this is a safe place for trans people to express themselves.

                  I’m glad that hexbear has been able to help people out with mutual aid. I passionately believe in the concept of mutual aid. We recently had someone who very well could have ended up homeless and in danger but the community pulled together to get them financial help and a place to stay. I hope that similar outcomes can happen for people who are in need in the future. We have a support network and community in the works right now.

            • AdaA
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              9 months ago

              The only thing I will add to that is that once I became aware of the leaked DM, I removed the post myself, contacted the lead mod and made it clear that posting DMs without permission is not acceptable.

              I don’t feel it was something that warranted demoting or removal, unless the action is repeated, which it has not been. I agree that reposting it blanked out with passive aggressive comments didn’t help anything, but by the same token, neither did the active dog piling that several of our users (including myself) received from Hexbear, most/all of whom are still active. Just as you disagree with the Blahaj moderation expectations in regards to 196, I disagree with the Hexbear moderation expectations in regards to dogpiling and harassment. Norms tolerated on Hexbear would get someone banned from Blahaj very quickly. I watched as you tried to work around the dunking culture just enough so that we could work together, and I watched as your efforts failed.

              I won’t defend the actions of some of our users in the events that went down, yet I feel that many Hexbear users seem to gloss over the actions from many of their community members. Hexbear was not an innocent party in this.

              For all of that, trans solidarity is incredibly important to me, and like you, I would refederate with Hexbear if it were simply up to me, because I think trans solidarity is worth striving for, but like Hexbear, Blahaj users are strongly against refederating, and it seems like a bad choice to enforce “solidarity”, because at that point, it isn’t solidarity.

              And on a final note, despite the fact we never resolved this situation, working with you as we tried to resolve it was a moment of positivity in an otherwise shitty series of events. You do Hexbear proud

          • audiomodder
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            9 months ago

            I would say you can check my post history if you want details, but it was a pretty divisive and heated disagreement about whether we would continue to be federated or not with them. There were a lot of reasons though.

        • spujb@lemmy.cafe
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          9 months ago

          i don’t see any rules against defederation evading. i do think it’s kinda weird of OP to post this here though. why not poll blahaj zone? like what is the goal here lol

          edit: oops there was a recent parallel blahaj zone poll that i missed, makes a bit more sense

          • cowboycrustation [he/him]M
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            9 months ago

            She probably saw my survey post and either already had the data or wanted to collect more data. I don’t find it too weird.

          • Neato@ttrpg.network
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            9 months ago

            You’re right. This instance doesn’t actually have rules per se. And their interface is a bit different than others so I’m only mostly sure hexbear is defederated.

  • remotelove@lemmy.ca
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    9 months ago

    Run the survey again on .ml in a ‘news’ community. I kinda would expect a little more diversity on Hexbear, but on that other one… Whooo boy!

  • Catoblepas
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    9 months ago

    Yes votes by pronoun: he/him 3.0%

    Damn, there really aren’t many trans dudes on the fediverse, huh?

    • cowboycrustation [he/him]M
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      I’m pissed about this. On the survey I did, there are even less than that. There were more cis women than binary trans men in the results. It’s ridiculous and is a problem that needs fixing.

      c/FTM is miniscule in size compared to MTF. Why would trans men want to be here if there’s hardly any on here? I say this as a trans man myself.

      • good_girl
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        9 months ago

        It’s unfortunate but it’s how it is. i wouldn’t really know where the online trans man spaces are, but I’ve known more trans masc individuals irl vs trans femmes.

        I’ve heard there’s bigger communities on tumblr, tiktok, and twitter. I do wonder if lemmy could grow by reaching out to these spaces, but I also know how hostile some social media sites are to other forms of social media.

        • cowboycrustation [he/him]M
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          Tumblr does have a sizable portion of trans men. Reddit does too. I can’t speak for Twitter and tiktok because I don’t use them. That’s a good idea for reaching out to those platforms.

          I’d be weary to reach out to Twitter and tiktok for fear of attracting too many trolls. They seem like worse cesspools than Tumblr and reddit at the moment, especially Twitter.

          • good_girl
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            I’d be weary to reach out to Twitter and tiktok for fear of attracting too many trolls. They seem like worse cesspools than Tumblr and reddit at the moment, especially Twitter.

            Very true, recruiting from those two would take quite a bit of vetting at first.

            • cowboycrustation [he/him]M
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              And Instagram…there’s so much transphobia on there. So much transphobia. Sometimes it’s on posts that have nothing to do with being trans. I don’t even consume trans content on there and it still manages to show up from time to time.

    • good_girl
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      9 months ago

      Presumably it’s a result of so many users being ex-reddit users, so the demographics reflect the equally disparate situation of reddit.

      • cowboycrustation [he/him]M
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        9 months ago

        No, that’s not it. The demographics aren’t as skewed as the stereotypes of reddit say that they are, especially in recent years.

      • Catoblepas
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        9 months ago

        IIRC the MTF and FTM communities on Reddit had roughly equal membership.

  • marcie (she/her)@lemmy.ml
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    9 months ago

    neat. this is about what it seemed like to me. not sure what the drama is about but im just glad there are trans places here