Ouch! That reminds me of one of the episodes which led to my egg cracking…
Scene: me, out drinking with some friends who just happen to all be women (no hint there, obviously). Fairly well-oiled at this point.
Me: Since everyone else is a girl, maybe I should just become one too, ha ha!
Fren (surprised): Where did that come from? Are you transgender? That’s cool if you are, I’m bi by the way.
Me: Ha ha no, only joking, just felt like the odd one out that’s all, let’s change the subject right now…
Me (to self): fuck fuck fuck where did that come from, I mean I do want to be a girl, but cis people don’t say that kind of thing, dumbass
Get home; wake up with hangover and gender crisis.
Damn, that’s intense! It does feel oddly familiar haha. I was on self-imposed copium for most of my life so my internal monologue would happily have added “Still cis tho!” to the end there 😅
I didn’t have any breakthrough moments when I started questioning, but I did when I realized girl was right for me. I imagined life as a mom, and the years of questioning fell into place. I never wanted to be a man. Even when I want to be more masculine, it’s still as a masculine woman, not an enby or a man.
I also want kids, an even sadder realization after telling myself I shouldn’t bring any into this world. I just want to be a mom. I didn’t choose to want it, but that’s life 🤷♀️
Ouch! That reminds me of one of the episodes which led to my egg cracking…
Scene: me, out drinking with some friends who just happen to all be women (no hint there, obviously). Fairly well-oiled at this point.
Me: Since everyone else is a girl, maybe I should just become one too, ha ha!
Fren (surprised): Where did that come from? Are you transgender? That’s cool if you are, I’m bi by the way.
Me: Ha ha no, only joking, just felt like the odd one out that’s all, let’s change the subject right now…
Me (to self): fuck fuck fuck where did that come from, I mean I do want to be a girl, but cis people don’t say that kind of thing, dumbass
Get home; wake up with hangover and gender crisis.
Damn, that’s intense! It does feel oddly familiar haha. I was on self-imposed copium for most of my life so my internal monologue would happily have added “Still cis tho!” to the end there 😅
I didn’t have any breakthrough moments when I started questioning, but I did when I realized girl was right for me. I imagined life as a mom, and the years of questioning fell into place. I never wanted to be a man. Even when I want to be more masculine, it’s still as a masculine woman, not an enby or a man.
I also want kids, an even sadder realization after telling myself I shouldn’t bring any into this world. I just want to be a mom. I didn’t choose to want it, but that’s life 🤷♀️