(Content warning, discussions of SA and misogyny, mods I might mention politics a bit but I hope this can be taken outside the context of politics and understood as a discussion of basic human decency)

We all know how awful Reddit was when a user mentioned their gender. Immediate harassment, DMs, etc. It’s probably improved over the years? But still awful.

Until recently, Lemmy was the most progressive and supportive of basic human dignity of communities I had ever followed. I have always known this was a majority male platform, but I have been relatively pleased to see that positive expressions of masculinity have won out.

All of that changed with the recent “bear vs man” debacle. I saw women get shouted down just for expressing their stories of being sexually abused, repeatedly harassed, dogpiled, and brigaded with downvotes. Some of them held their ground, for which I am proud of them, but others I saw driven to delete their entire accounts, presumably not to return.

And I get it. The bear thing is controversial; we can all agree on this. But that should never have resulted in this level of toxicity!

I am hoping by making this post I can kind of bring awareness to this weakness, so that we can learn and grow as a community. We need to hold one another accountable for this, or the gender gap on this site is just going to get worse.

  • whoreticulture
    2·
    6 months ago

    You KNOW that you are being a polite asshole and won’t get your comment taken down. That is the entire point of my contention with you and the inequitable civility rule. You are IGNORING all of my points.

    You bragged about how you’re such a good guy because you’re a mod. You just keep pretending to miss the point! It’s really obvious!

    You have literally not addressed anything I have said and have perpetually deflected. I think the only reason you are continuing to respond is you are hoping I’ll get frustrated and say something that a mod will ban me over. This is exactly why these civility rules suck. This is why you suck. You have no response to any of my explanations and then lie and say I haven’t explained myself. Every time I see you comment, my day gets worse, because you’re always doing the same thing in every discussion I’ve seen you in.

    And not once have you said “my bad” or “I’m wrong” even though you have been mistaken or presumptive multiple times. 🙄

      • whoreticulture
        1·
        6 months ago

        engage with the content of my post challenge level: impossible.

        you are doing the same thing you always do and trying to bring this into a semantic argument.

        you are scum defending these stupid civility rules when the way you engage with other people is just like, mind bogglingly obtuse and assholeish.

          • whoreticulture
            1·
            6 months ago

            Once again, you ignore anything of actual substance. The civility rules are inequitable. Enforcing them makes you a shit person. You have no rebuttal or defense for this so you try to focus on other things, but I think at this point you just know I’m right.

              • whoreticulture
                1·
                6 months ago

                Enforcing shitty rules makes you a shit person. That’s an accurate description. You continue to admit through your silence on the matter that the rules are unfair, and you benefit from them.

                You’re not engaging on the topic because you know I’m right.

                • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
                  1·
                  6 months ago

                  And yet it is still a lie that I bragged about being “such a good guy.”

                  No amount of aggression, insults or berating posts will make that true. You can say whatever you like to me and that still won’t be true. It’s a lie. It’s not my fault you lied.

                  • whoreticulture
                    1·
                    6 months ago

                    I never quoted you, I am pulling out the substance of your argument here:

                    Do you think maybe I wouldn’t be moderating several communities if I were the problem you think I am? Do you think I forced World News or Lemmy Shitpost to make me a moderator? I didn’t even ask.

                    This is definitely flaunting, and definitely using your mod status to make you out to be a good person.

                    I fucking hate you for going into this stupid pedantic argument. This is what you always do. Literally always. I won’t be continuing with this line anymore, I have quoted you directly and there is nothing more to say. Fucking tool.

                    You have nothing to say about civility rules? You can’t defend yourself at all? You are okay with knowing you are upholding rules that silence minority opinions and rightfully angry individuals? How long can you ignore the topic?

                    Not once have you meaningfuly engaged with what I have been telling you. You are unable to because it threatens your sense of power.