To this day, she remembers the racing thoughts, the instant nausea, the hairs prickling up on her legs, the sweaty palms. She had shared a photograph of herself in her underwear with a boy she trusted and, very soon, it had been sent around the school and across her small home town, Aberystwyth, Wales. She became a local celebrity for all the wrong reasons. Younger kids would approach her laughing and ask for a hug. Members of the men’s football team saw it – and one showed someone who knew Davies’s nan, so that’s how her family found out.
Her book, No One Wants to See Your D*ck, takes a deep dive into the negatives. It covers Davies’s experiences in the digital world – that includes cyberflashing such as all those unsolicited dick pics – as well as the widespread use of her images on pornography sites, escort services, dating apps, sex chats (“Ready for Rape? Role play now!” with her picture alongside it). However, the book also shines a light on the dark online men’s spaces, what they’re saying, the “games” they’re playing. “I wanted to show the reality of what men are doing,” says Davies. “People will say: ‘It’s not all men’ and no, it isn’t, but it also isn’t a small number of weirdos on the dark web in their mum’s basements. These are forums with millions of members on mainstream sites such as Reddit, Discord and 4chan. These are men writing about their wives, their mums, their mate’s daughter, exchanging images, sharing women’s names, socials and contact details, and no one – not one man – is calling them out. They’re patting each other on the back.”
Except they’re not at all the same, you understand that, right? Misogyny is build upon layers of social and systemic discrimination
I invite you to look into the term misandry some more: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Misandry
Trusting a wikipedia link to make your point for you doesn’t work any better on lemmy than it did on reddit. In case anyone is curious, a couple excerpts from wikipedia
They aren’t equivalent-but-gender-flipped terms anymore, because “misandry” has been hijacked by the incels as a dogwhistle and convenient catchall term to dismiss concerns exactly like what’s in this thread. While I don’t think HexesofVexes intended this, they’re conflating the two terms to be equivalent in meaning which, when taken in context, just simply isn’t true.
At the root it’s a very difficult topic to address, let me change my language a little to avoid the politics implied by the room.
When you generalise a negative trait to a particular gender, you are making a sexist and hateful comment. The “emotional woman” and the “deceitful gold digger”, the “violent man” and the “potential rapist” - the former would lead to a talk with HR, the latter leads to open agreement and often accolade.
The argument made for this discrepancy is that it is redressing the systemic sexism built into our society, but I think that it has ceased to do so and us now fuelling the misogyny more than it is addressing it.
There is a need to redress societal imbalance that disadvantages women - however hatred only breeds more hatred. The path currently taken is wrong, and history will show that to be true.