I’m comfortable being a woman with my lady parts. I also like to pretend. I told people I was male (transmasc, specifically) so that I could freely experience attraction to just men without having the “straight” label.
Whatever I was, I did NOT want to be straight, so presenting as a trans guy helped me feel better about myself. I could be a gay man. Then, I was a non-binary demiboy (either gay or bi but would only date men).
I felt like a girl in real life. I still do. I didn’t feel dysphoria nor a desire to transition in any way, neither socially nor physically nor anything. It just felt relieving to be a gay trans guy, but that still made me trans even though I didn’t identify as male nor did I ever see myself as male, right?
(I see myself as a woman and always have, I don’t have dysphoria. I identify as a woman who wants a penis. I think I’m moreso attracted to the idea of having male parts than actually seeing myself as a guy, but like I said, it relieved me to be gay and not straight.)
long story short, I’m a woman slightly attracted to the idea of herself being a trans guy or having a penis.
What about being straight or at least having that label is it you dislike?
It feels bland and basic, and I basically live to not be a basic girl. I want to be spicy and strong, not just like a girl who starts drama and complains like your average basic girl.
People have already called me basic IRL because I like Starbucks, I’m straight, and obsessed with TikTok.
Then try being legitimately interesting, rather than co-opting an identity that doesn’t actually belong to you.
Also there’s nothing wrong with “basic.” Most of us are basic in some ways and interesting in other ways. Surely being straight and liking Starbucks and TikTok is not the sum total of who you are. Figure out the ways in which you’re unique and interesting. If you don’t think there are enough, then put the time into developing new hobbies. Personal growth is amazing. But don’t lie about who you are. That’s way worse than being basic.
ETA: I forgot to mention, based on this:
you should get your internalized misogyny figured out. Like, pronto.
We get it, the pull towards fitting in and homogeneity is strong, however, you can totally be gender nonconforming without needing to be trans. We suggest start changing up your style and attitude offline and see how it suits you! Start having a more diverse array of interests. Genuinely hope this helps!