Hey OP, I’ve been diagnosed with a social anxiety disorder, and I just want to say your post resonated with me.

You don’t have to talk to people if you don’t want to. In day-to-day life you can avoid it. Sooner or later though, you will end up in a situation where you have to talk to someone, whether that’s a doctor, emergency services, or you’re stuck on the bus with someone chatty.

If you’re happy as a clam not to talk to people, then power to you. Don’t let anybody dictate how you should live your life - it’s your life. However, if talking to people causes you distress, and the consequences of not talking to people also causes you distress, then in my humble opinion you owe it to yourself to challenge your beliefs.

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I don’t want to presume to know your situation, so I’ll share some of mine. I’ve had some significant ups and downs. When I was down, I often lamented that I couldn’t make friends, would never find a partner, and stewed in my thoughts for no real benefit. I’ve also had some ups - I enrolled in college, tried new things even though it scared me, and even did some public speaking.

Then the pandemic happened, and the overarching mood of isolation and fear really did a number on me. Before the pandemic, I would have tentatively said that I became a social butterfly. Now I’m back to stewing in myself a lot of the time. But I’m putting myself out there again, and I’m confident with time that I’ll end up okay.

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If you are experiencing distress about your situation, know that nothing is written in stone about your future. It’s not always easy, and sometimes it takes longer than we’d like, but you can improve your mind so you don’t feel distress.

I really resisted therapy for a long time. The idea of talking to a stranger was difficult enough, so baring my soul to a therapist was total anathema to me. But I did get some books recommended to me, and I learned about Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. Not only is CBT the gold standard of psychiatric care, but it’s also possible to practice in a completely self-directed way. That was very attractive to me, and I’ve been noticing an improvement since I’ve started. If you’d like to know more, I can certainly share some resources with you.

Anyway, one last thing to leave with you - I’ve been thinking of my time on Lemmy as being “practising socializing.” It’s becoming easier and easier to talk to strangers online, and that carries over to meatspace too.

You’re doing a good job, OP. Good luck out there